Am I really here?
Well this is what I've been thinking lately...Usually before I fall asleep or if I'm walking on Campus of school I think to myself "am I really here? Do I really exist." Sometimes I really think this place cannot be real. Usually I think it's some sort of action similar to the Matrix. But seriously, how can this be real? Bad breath is just terrible. After trying numerous methods of trying to relieve it, does not go away. How is that possible? I just can't understand it. There's no way that this can be real. I feel as if sometimes that I will be saved and that someone will take me back to the real world. I've lost everything due to my bad breath. I've never thought my life would end at the age of 18.
It's quite sad really. I've had all of these high expectations and yet they've all faded within the blink of an eye. I dreamnt of having a great job, a wife, a nice car and a nice house. But bad breath doesn't allow you to have any of that. Sometimes I think that there is an outside factor giving me this disease day by day. There has to be a way to bend or break this outside factor. How is this possible? I really don't think it's not. Ever since I've realized I've had bad breath I've become a very insightful, sptiritual and thinking person.
Why us? Why? Why couldn't I be like a normal person. Due to this disease my life is ruined. I can't even get the things I want or need for that matter. I'm going to be a PhD living on the street just because I can't find a job because of my bad breath. Amazing huh? A person whom does extremely well in college and will be getting major titles will be a bum just because of this STUPID disease. That's why I think this is not real. Did you ever hear of a bum with a PhD? I think not. Heh. Sometimes I laugh and cry thinking of how this is the ultimate and final blow to my life. I swear I've never seen this coming. I had friends and girls at a point. I was living it up as any normal person and the BAM. The walls of reality came crashing down on me. One minute I'm having fun talking with people normally and the next I'm a recluse that can't talk to anyone. It can drive a man insane. Literally. I'm afraid this disease will cause me to go insane. It's a scary thing.