Wrestling With God
Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 4:54 am
i have wrestled with God more times than i can count....because of this angst-ridden-surreal-befuddling-soul crushing-killer of a malady.
I have asked for healing. I have wanted to die. Seriously. I have been angry, resented those without the condition, that don't have a clue.
More times than i can count, i'd ferget i was "diff'rent" and be chatting animatedly, laughing, etc. And whoop, there it is.....the reactions.
Almost like something saying to me "here's a little something to wipe that silly grin off yer face, KA-POW!!!!!
It seems i fergot i was "diff'rent"...how DARE i?
It's a REAL surreal journey, when you're a Christian, a child of the Most High God. Oh the convrsations i've had with Him. THe not speaking to Him. The being FURIOUS with Him, and telling Him to just take me off the planet.
Yet I DO return. I miss him too much not to. And Last night He was working in my heart BIG TIME.
Let's pray together. Do you know how HARD it is to find prayer partners or sites that address THIS problem. It seems they're all oblivious.
Don't get me started.
All right, back on track. Idiocy is NOT gonna get my feathers ruffled. I'm focusing on God. HE is my Redeemer, my Healer, and the Lover of my soul.
Jimi don't know it, but God is using him mightily. May Jimi be blessed in more ways than he can fathom, and quickly.
God bless you Jimi.
I have asked for healing. I have wanted to die. Seriously. I have been angry, resented those without the condition, that don't have a clue.
More times than i can count, i'd ferget i was "diff'rent" and be chatting animatedly, laughing, etc. And whoop, there it is.....the reactions.
Almost like something saying to me "here's a little something to wipe that silly grin off yer face, KA-POW!!!!!
It seems i fergot i was "diff'rent"...how DARE i?
It's a REAL surreal journey, when you're a Christian, a child of the Most High God. Oh the convrsations i've had with Him. THe not speaking to Him. The being FURIOUS with Him, and telling Him to just take me off the planet.
Yet I DO return. I miss him too much not to. And Last night He was working in my heart BIG TIME.
Let's pray together. Do you know how HARD it is to find prayer partners or sites that address THIS problem. It seems they're all oblivious.
Don't get me started.
All right, back on track. Idiocy is NOT gonna get my feathers ruffled. I'm focusing on God. HE is my Redeemer, my Healer, and the Lover of my soul.
Jimi don't know it, but God is using him mightily. May Jimi be blessed in more ways than he can fathom, and quickly.
God bless you Jimi.