emotional rescue wrote:What i´m trying to say is thakfully you haven´t experience what is to deal with this when you are a teenage: it really fucks your mind man. No teenage is mentally prepared to deal with something like this.
I agree 100% with emotional resque. It does slowly **** your mind up. I remember it all started when I was about 14 too. My freshman year at highschool I was actually still pretty social. I had one or two friends who complained about my bb a lot. But at that time I didn't think it was something serious, I thought: "ya know everyone has bb from time to times." But my situation was clearly different. The funny thing was that no one ever bullied me for it, they were just being plain honest. Maybe they felt sorry for me, I don't know.
My second year I still had some friends I talked to, although they thought I was very weird, because I would talk to them from 5 meters away. I did this because I was more self conscious about it, because my brother told me not to talk to people from such a close distance, otherwise they wouldn't talk to me if they smelled my bb. So that's actually what I did. I started to notice all these reactions from other people when I talked to them. From touching their noses to coughing...oh well any reaction you guys are familiar with. I knew I was makin other people very uncomfortable. They would even wait a couple of seconds before they would say anything back with a very uncomfortable look on his face.
My third year we moved to another country, and that's when I couldn't bring myself to make any friends. It was a new school and eventually teachers tried to help me, but then they saw that I didn't wanted to talk to any of my classmates, which got them to think I didn't wanted any friends. I was as anti-social as possible. I created a world of imaginary friends and this is pretty much the only thing that kept me goin. I know it's sad, but as soon as I saw a reaction when I said somerthing to someone, I felt really low. I'm starting to think that I would have been much better off if there was some kind of medication that would keep my mind off the whole bad breath thing, since there is no cure available yet. Lucky I still talked to my family though, cause I know they wouldn't mind if I made them uncomfortable, so I wasn't completely anti-social. I was also constant ly paying attention to other loner students. There were some, but when they talked to someone, they didn't seem make any other persons uncomfortable, and they were also pretty confident e.g. they would look the other person straight in the eyes. I remember I always thought "Damn, why would you choose to be a loner, it sucks, why not communicate as much as you can, you don't even have to be careful".
This lasted for 4 years until now I'm in college. I thought I would have found the cure by now. Sometimes I still see some old students that were in the same highschool as me and when they see me they are like "Look that's the kid who's always alone" and of course makin fun of me. I always thought that if they suffered from the same problem, they wouldn't be where they are now, making fun of someone. But I have learned how to deal with this now, I usually just ignore them.