Story of My Life

[Phantasist]

Here's my story: It started when I was about 12 years old and I was sitting next to my friend in the school auditorium. I was whistling, and my friend said, "Don't blow in my direction, you stink". It was the beginning of the end of my life as I knew it. Of course I thought that this "little" problem would be taken care of. Little did I know. Since then my entire life has been pervaded by the problem of bad breath. Not a day goes by when I am not aware of it and take precautions. I never breathe directly into anyone's face. When I talk to people I face slightly away from them. I'm especially careful when I'm sitting next to someone, or in an elevator, or even in a car. What this does to the possibility of romance is absolutely devastating. Can you impress a girl by breathing a stench into her face? I don't think so. And what about a job interview? How many jobs did I not get because people just wanted me out of there? I was always a good student in school. A lot of good it did me. I was at least able to make a living, but I certainly have not been the person I should have been. When I was younger this intractable problem caused me to be so depressed that I almost committed s*****e.
Brushing didn't help. Mouthwash didn't help. Flossing didn't help. Food didn't seem to have any effect. My tonsils were removed when I was a kid. For a while I thought I might have a sinus infection, but the ENT doctor X-rayed my head and said no. My regular doctor said that I have no bad breath. An obvious idiot. Everyone could smell it but him. No one knew anything and my life had turned into crap. I was beginning to think I was cursed. The crazy thing is I have a friend who never even brushes his teeth. They are green, but he doesn't have bad breath! And everyone thinks that if you have bad breath it's because you don't brush your teeth. My mother also always had an odor on her breath and lately I have been thinking that this is inherited. It could be some sort of genetic defect. If that is the case, there is little hope. This forum has given me a couple of ideas and lately I seem to be making some progress. We'll see. But most of my life has already been blown away, so I'm as good as finished anyway. I know what everyone in this forum is going through. No one who doesn't have this problem can possibly imagine what a devastating effect this has on your life. I hope at least some people find a cure.

[bacchus]

Yea its lovely that it seems to start during the teeage years isnt it, everyone else is having fun and your stuck in the house, isolated.

I think its made me develop greatly as a person as i know how great the suffering can be.

Theres not a fix all cure but you can chip away at all posiblities and solve your particular case. Judging by the comments on here theres clearly several forms of the ailment.

I at least have gradually made mine improve so i have some confidence back , but the mental scares will remain.

[malory]

Phantasist, I can't imagine what it must have been like for a 12 year old to have to suffer this nightmare. I've had bb for 14 years now (since age 30) and still can't cope alone. This site is great but I also find it really helpful to speak to someone face to face about bb. I spent 3 tearful hours at home last night after having been bullied at work all day. My eyes were still puffy this morning so that when I saw my counsellor she knew straight away that I was really down. All I did was speak to her and I felt less negative afterwards. We all have days when we see a negative future ahead and don't want to live to see it. But it's good to imagine a positive future and to fantasise about it. I once saw a neuroscientist who told me to imagine my life in the near future devoid of bb. All the things I would be able to do and to be. She said that IMAGINING having something you want could almost bring about the same feelings of contentment as if you really had it. You're talking about your future in a really negative way. Try hard to change the way you see your future and something positive will come. It might be something small but it is better than sinking further down into bb hell. Some day things might change for us.