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Feeling like giving up

Anger management part of the forum :), where you can express anger, sadness, sorrow etc.
sreid643
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Joined: Wed Nov 12, 2014 2:39 am

Feeling like giving up

Post by sreid643 »

As we all know bad breath can cause our feelings and emotions to get out of hand and it's a constant struggle learning how to cope despite what is happening. I've been trying to cope but I think I've reached my breaking point. My main problem is school. I'm so sick and tired of feeling the same way everyday. Everyday is generally a bad day or a terrible day. There has been a lot for me to consider right now. Again, I feel emotionally drained. I really do feel like giving up. I've been thinking that the advice I have gotten to throw myself into my school work or find a sense of confidence is always ruined by the issues in my life. It's very difficult to apply these principles when I have these problems. I feel disconnected from everything going on at school. My motivation is drained and I don't want to be suffering in a place that is already unpleasant as it is. I don't want to give up but everyday that I'm here is a bad day. I either have bad days or really bad days. I honestly don't really remember the last time I had a good day here. I know that it's just school but I don't want to be stuck in a place where I feel ten times worse than anywhere else and my emotions and feelings are the same everyday. I hate saying this but at this point I really don't care about school. I don't have the motivation or focus to continue on here. I've been over this for such a long time now and don't want to feel this way anymore. It's not just at school where I feel like this though. It's at home, the mall, the bus. Everywhere I go I struggle with my issues. The only place where I feel remotely happy is at home in my room watching Netflix. Obviously, this is not okay. I hate that I feel like I can't take full advantage of all that I have and all I can offer because of insecurities that are out of my control and issues with people who have only hurt me in my life. I'm almost to the point where I'm going to break and I don't want to get to this point but everyday is a struggle and I don't know how much more I can take. My grades are slipping, I skip class, and when I do attend class I just sit there with my head down and my thoughts racing. I'm so anti social and people probably think I'm weird or awkward. This is not me at all and I feel like school is the place where I feel the most unhappy and not like myself. I feel trapped and secluded. I don't want to throw my education away but I don't know how to cope. I feel like everything going on in my life had reached a breaking point and I'm slipping into depression. I don't want this to happen but I don't know what to do. I would honestly prefer to deal with my issues away from school but I don't want to feel like a failure. Any advice?


Atrial
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Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2014 1:42 pm

Post by Atrial »

Only god can help us.
Trunks99
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Joined: Sat Aug 30, 2014 8:18 am
Location: Norcal

Post by Trunks99 »

Every morning, ask God to help you get through the day without difficulties.

Also, watch your diet and don't give up researching, Maybe one day, God will relieve you from this burden.

Keep in mind that there must be a reason why we are all going through this and we must change strive ourselves for the better before expecting change to happen. That's my belief at least..
ExhaleSafely
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Post by ExhaleSafely »

I'm a long time lurker here who made an account finally to comment on this post.

Giving up on life if an absolute waste of your time. It's tough right now for you, maybe you smell, maybe you'll never "make it". None of that is a definite outcome for your future.

C'mon, keep going. I know I've worried about this going all the way back to elementary school (I'm now 25), and I'm doing pretty well at this point in my life (University grad with a job and friends and that). It sucks I know but it isn't worth giving up. If anything just let this experience strengthen your ability to deal with stress in the future. If you do ever get smelling "normal" and you gave up years before, you'll be kicking yourself forever. In contrast, if you do happen to start smelling "normal" while you're already doing good or at least stable in life, you're going to be awesome!!!

I hope you have a supportive friend or family or community group to help you out, because that will be important, but still, keep going.
nolagirl
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Post by nolagirl »

I know exactly how you feel. Most days for me feel like walking through tar, underwater, where i cant wait to fall into bed. It's called depression. But I really, really hope you take this advice from me: SEE A THERAPIST! If you can't afford it, find a low cost university therapist or ask your family for money to help you. Honestly, this one thing will help you so much. I'm 25 and I resisted going to a therapist for so many years because I thought they would just tell me I'm paranoid and crazy. I finally broke down and starting seeing an analytic psychiatrist a couple months ago after my boyfriend and I broke up (we had been dating 5 years and he was the one person I trusted). When the breakup happened, I felt like I literally had no one I trusted, no one I could tell my darkest secrets and deepest worries to, and I totally lost it. Feeling more suicidal than I ever have, I set up an apt with this therapist who I see once a week. First of all, it honestly sounds like you need to be on an antidepressant and something for your anxiety, both of which i'm on now and it's helped make life's challenges seem slightly more MANAGEABLE. Meds WONT make you stop thinking entirely about your bb, and they won't entirely cure your depression, but they will HELP. But they main reason that seeing a therapist will help you is because at this point you need to talk to someone about all these things racing through your head everyday in a safe space where you can finally let your guard down. Honestly, just talking to someone who is willing to listen to me and wants to help (crying my eyes out the whole time lol), and feeling safe to fully show and reveal how BADLY im hurting is such an emotional release. It feels draining but it also helps me get through the week knowing there is someone I can tell all of this to. Sorry for the long post, I just really want to share with you what has helped me.

ps My therapist says she can't smell me, but we sit fairly far apart. She acknowledges that there may be a grain of truth in everything I say about having bad breath, but that at this point it needs to be treated as a mental health issue, considering the amount of time I worry and obsess over it. I think this is totally true. This does not mean that I'm not still trying to find answers and solutions that might help me, but there comes a point where even if you have the worst breath in the world, it becomes a mental health issue more than anything. My therapist also has sincerely listened to a lot of my physical symptoms and offered some of her medical thoughts about what might be causing it, which I appreciate. She even gave me a number to a good rheumatologist so a could get a good blood panel done to rule out auto immune disorders. So not all therapists and doctors will roll their eyes at you and tell you that you're crazy is my point ;)
thanatos
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Post by thanatos »

Atrial wrote:Only god can help us.
So far he's forsaking us
Trunks99
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Joined: Sat Aug 30, 2014 8:18 am
Location: Norcal

Post by Trunks99 »

thanatos wrote:
Atrial wrote:Only god can help us.
So far he's forsaking us
Everyone faces trials and tribulations. Not only it humbles you, but it helps you become a better person if you have the right approach. Hang on, you may not see the benefits now, but you will see them later, if God wills. Let's stay positive. Having a community where we can share our stories, help each other, is a blessing from God. So no God is not forsaking anyone.
MissingLateral2
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Post by MissingLateral2 »

First of all you have to give up the negativity. There are lots of things you can do in solitude. So enjoy this beautiful life alone as much as you can. You will see a vast difference in your life with positive attitude
Second, regarding this problem can you give oil pulling a chance. I have been doing oil pulling for more that one year (using sesame oil but you can use anything which you are convenient with) and it has really reduced the occurence of tonsil stones (almost to zero) and also the white tongure syndrome has reduced to nil. Alongwith oil pulling, I have been exercising and been having a positive attitude towards life.

I only wish that you enjoy your life as much as you possibly can and not be bogged down in life because of the negativity that halitosis brings (Because I have wasted precious moments of life in that and there is nothing good about it )!
Hope this helps!
Miffy90
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Post by Miffy90 »

I agree with MissingLateral2 about finding things you can do in solitude. Ive had this problem since I was 13 (now 24!) so I can definitely relate to it being incredibly hard to get through school - I was quiet and shy anyway so bad breath rendered me basically a mute! I would always rush home after school to curl up in front of the TV which was the best and easiest form of escapism for me (something I still do a lot of as well as read - although I think i'd do this regardless of the bad breath because I love stories!!) Over the years i've always felt that i was in a sort of suspended state - waiting to be released from this so I could actually begin life - but the last couple of years I have slowly but surely been bringing myself to terms with the fact that I may never be cured. I wont ever give up hope but if this is my lot then I dont want to get to my death bed and look back on my life and think i've just wasted it, so I started coming up with lists of things that I can do or aspire to even with this condition - e.g. I can own animals - I love dogs and they're a great way to get unconditional love, i'd also love to have chickens and a goat one day; gardening - this has never been something i've been particularly interested in but all my family and relatives are doing it constantly and apparently its meant to be incredibly soothing and rewarding, (and i've always loved sitting in gorgeous gardens) so this summer i'm going to get involved with my parent's garden / veg patch and start learning. There are other 'relaxing' things that i've started doing like teaching myself the piano, yoga, and meditation - i realise this is starting to sound a little hippyish but knowing I have these things has really helped me. Plus I think talking to and meeting with people on here would be so helpful if your struggling. Hang on in there!
Atrial
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Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2014 1:42 pm

Post by Atrial »

Miffy90 wrote:I agree with MissingLateral2 about finding things you can do in solitude. Ive had this problem since I was 13 (now 24!) so I can definitely relate to it being incredibly hard to get through school - I was quiet and shy anyway so bad breath rendered me basically a mute! I would always rush home after school to curl up in front of the TV which was the best and easiest form of escapism for me (something I still do a lot of as well as read - although I think i'd do this regardless of the bad breath because I love stories!!) Over the years i've always felt that i was in a sort of suspended state - waiting to be released from this so I could actually begin life - but the last couple of years I have slowly but surely been bringing myself to terms with the fact that I may never be cured. I wont ever give up hope but if this is my lot then I dont want to get to my death bed and look back on my life and think i've just wasted it, so I started coming up with lists of things that I can do or aspire to even with this condition - e.g. I can own animals - I love dogs and they're a great way to get unconditional love, i'd also love to have chickens and a goat one day; gardening - this has never been something i've been particularly interested in but all my family and relatives are doing it constantly and apparently its meant to be incredibly soothing and rewarding, (and i've always loved sitting in gorgeous gardens) so this summer i'm going to get involved with my parent's garden / veg patch and start learning. There are other 'relaxing' things that i've started doing like teaching myself the piano, yoga, and meditation - i realise this is starting to sound a little hippyish but knowing I have these things has really helped me. Plus I think talking to and meeting with people on here would be so helpful if your struggling. Hang on in there!


Miffy I sent you PM
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