More Random Sh#t

[lolalola]

So another thought popped up in my mind and that is why I am the way I am. I know under the odor of bb, I am a fun, articulate person who wants to enjoy life but the person that is standing infront of me in the mirror is an angry person. I am angry when people try to talk to me because I can only mumble or give one word answers or use body language to express myself. When people try to talk to me I act like I am being interrogated and they get annoyed or they smell the bb and are taken back. The only defense I have is to act like something is wrong with them but in reality I am BITTER that they don't have BB!! I also get very angry when see other people interact all close. I hate movies where people are in love and kiss and make love. It is as if my body gets wobbly and heart sinks when I see that kind of free love being shown.

Basically my anger due to my bb consumes me. I get so frustrated at NOT being able to live my life I can only be hateful... Sometimes when I feel my friends may want to even get close to me, I always pull away and they are probably like who does she think she is, she has BB!!
I hate the person I have become but I cannot help myself. Other times I had contemplate s*****e. Now I have lived with BB close to 30 years!! When will I get a break?? When is the cure coming??
I was one step away a long time ago to drinking bleach to try to "cure" the bb. Thank God I had the sense to put it down. I don't know what I would do without my husband! Atleast at home I feel safe. I am worried that my nieces will one day tell me I have bb. They are really young and when I hug them and stuff I have seen them cringe their noses. I am telling you right now when that day comes, I won't be able to get out bed.

[sandy]

I can relate everything you say and am exactly in the same situation you are and thank God for my husband & kids.I feel lucky enough that i can always ask my daughter or husband before going out anywhere how my bb is & ...So at least i know what it smells like & chew extra strong gum since nothing eles works.We are Blessed that we have someone....just think of those suffering more than we who are alone..who dont have anyone....so we should be very thankful.There is always hope and we must have faith and not fall into darkness.We are all going through the same thing and just think that were not alone like we all thought before we came to this site...and many thanks to Jimi for setting it up. We all need stick together and fight together to help out any way we can for that CURE.
God Bless!

[Shekaib]

Wow Lola and Sandy, I feel like you guys read all my thoughts and frustrations about bb. I feel the same exact way; keeping myself away from people, not being able to enjoy hanging out and being close with my family and friends. It's really bad.

I'm 19 years old and I've had bb since my Hep. C therapy with a new medicine called "Interferon." I don't know why, but I got bb ever since. Recently, I went to my dentist and finally decided to talk to him about my problems and he flat out shot me down saying bb can't be cured and that I should just cover it up.

Now, I'm really hopeless. I don't know what to do other than just 'cover it up.'

On this site on another thread about MMS, many people are finding that it's really helping their bb. Soon I will order it and see how much it will help. Even a little help will be good.


>.<

[lolalola]

What is MMS? Where can I order it from?

[lolalola]

ok just remembered the time i was in a theatre class in college. i had to act in a play the last week of school. anyway the teacher told me i am a great actress but the people i worked with on stage never ever talked to me after the play and they all went out to celebrate without me. I guess i got so carried away with the acting, didnt care that I was torturing the other "actors" with my toxic funk.

[Speak_no_evil]

I am angry when people try to talk to me because I can only mumble or give one word answers or use body language to express myself. When people try to talk to me I act like I am being interrogated and they get annoyed or they smell the bb and are taken back. The only defense I have is to act like something is wrong with them but in reality I am BITTER that they don't have BB!!

Basically my anger due to my bb consumes me. I get so frustrated at NOT being able to live my life I can only be hateful... Sometimes when I feel my friends may want to even get close to me, I always pull away and they are probably like who does she think she is, she has BB!!

This is crazy! I experience the EXACT same feelings. I get really pissed off when people try and make conversation or when they get too close. My anxiety level skyrockets, I began to sweat profusely (another problem to worry about) and I just want the person to get the hell away from me. I literally hate them for placing me in such an uncomfortable position.

I also worry that my co-workers talk about how I have no right to be so arrogant when my breath stinks.

I am always obsessing over close people are when they talk to each other both in real life and television/movies.