Family reunion yesterday

[meowkity1]

I went. Thank God it was outside and I was with my son at the playground most of the time.
Before any family gathering, I usually spend the morninbg crying , and asking God to send the angels for a cleasning (they must be too busy for me)
Any way I tried to enjoy myself and my breath was ok, but I knew once we ate it would be over. My sister and me were sitting on a bench with our mom, and my sister asked my mom for a mint, she said her breath tasted bad. I said were sitting so close, your probably just tasting my breath. My mom got all loud, Oh my God, when are you going to get over this, you do not have bad breath. Is that why she keeps rubbing and sneezing, and lihting cigarettes back to back. One of my cousins must of forgot about my breath, he came to join us on the bench, well that lasted less than a minute.
All my family was there but I felt alone, I on purposely sat by myself to eat, if I didnt have bad breath I wouldve been invited to sit with everyone.
After we ate, I chewwed on a pickle for about an hour just they could think it was the pickle that was causingit. Someone even said geez is that your 3rd pickle. I only had one.
This is my moms side of the family, I get my good looks from my das side there very beautiful people mixed with white black and indian, tan skinned people with long hair and some with green eyes like myself. So on my moms side I was always the outcast because of my looks, but not in a bad way, I was just known as the pretty one that was going to grow up to be the model, and people always asked if they could steal my eys, or do I have contacts,
So its really sad to be the most beautiful person out of probably 30 people, but I am the stankest.
Its so hard, I get hit on all the time, I want to start dating and enjoing myself again, I want to party and flirt with the men I may be attracted to. I lost the love of my life because of this, and its killing me.
So today is Sunday I took my shower and I cried for about 20 minutes in the shower, because I am so tired. When I got out I got my razor blade and I heated it up on the stove. My plan was to just try to cut my tongue hairs in the back, not only are they long but their thick too. Plus I have those big bumps. The back is really my main problem. No matter how much I clean I can get the front fairly pink, and when I do get the back clean, and I stick my tongue out in the mirror I swear I can just see the white come back in seconds right before my eyes. Well I dont know if the blade wasnt sharp enough or it wasnt hot enough bout it didnt work. I didnt care how bad it burned, I just want the back to be a flat clear surface, a coulpe of weeks ago, I sanitized my nail clippers, and I was successful at clipping a feww of the long hairs on the sides. But the problem is once you have your tongue stuck out for so long it starts to shake and hort.
Please note I am not trying to persuade people to go through thse drastic measures. If I had to give up the taste of food forever for good breath I would.
I AM SO ****ing TIRED
I hope soon the day will coome when Jimi can shut this site down, only because wont need it anymore.

[sandy]

I feel for you & know exactly how you feel. Your a beautiful girl with a beautiful son and if your man didn't stuck by you than he was an ass. He should of stayed by you. I believe there is hope & maybe a purpose for this but there will be a cure for us.I know we are broken hearted people & they dont understand what were going through, only us & Thank God for Jimi who created this site for the broken hearts that some day will be healed. Just hang in there cause Im aslo hanging on hope too for my kids and for my husband. Im pretty much going through this all alone, I dont even mention to my husband how i feel about this but said one time I think Im curse with this disease. Im also attractive woman who is almost turning 40 but I look younger than my age.My daughter is 11 & she's great & she is honest with me about my bb, but she knows not to say anything in front of people & my son who is 6 just a typical happy 6 yr old. When there is ever family gathering's I put a couple of pieces of gum of juicy fruit in my pocket & when I'm finished eating I pop one in my mouth than people will start to commet & say oh it smells good & then I would offer them & they would take one for themselves & when the flavour runs out I go to the bathroom & pop another one in my mouth. Are you working right now?

[sandy]

By the way Im keeping up with your diary about the blue light flashlight. Thats great what your doing. I'm still waiting for the order from ebay but I ordered the wireless dental led curing lamp, blue light, wavelengh 420nm-480nm.As soon as I recieve it I will be posting the results. I wanted to ask you start drinking green tea in the morning & in the eveing.That wards off the infection in our body and helps with the inflamation we might have in our mouths or body. I find it helps me. Also are you located from the states or from Canada.Im from Canada, it will be cool if you live around here we can meet up or something & have our kids play together.