what do you suggest I do in this situation
Posted: Sat Dec 01, 2012 12:46 pm
Hi everyone
Im going start by saying I havent really been dealt good cards in my life. I have crippling anxiety and of course, severe bad breath. And they dont mix very well together to say the least. And ive come to realise that I will probably not be cured. i simply dont know what to do with myself. I am very quiet and I dont talk very much to anyone except my friends at school (having this problem as a 16 year old is TORTURE btw). Two of my friends know about my problem, but they are ok with it, they still chat to me and stuff. I have one friend outside of school who I am super close with and he has a 20% sense of smell most of the time which is great. I have another very close friend and he puts up with me pretty well, he likes it when i sit next to him despite my problem. So my friend situation is pretty good
However, school itself SUCKS. Class is terrible. Whoever I sit next to covers their noses and when I sit next to a girl I cant even concentrate because I know I am disgusting them. So in about 40-50% of my classes I sit alone, if I have friends in my class I sit with them. I am pretty unpopular and I dont really talk to anyone outside of my group. Some people only know me for my BB, they smell it, then dont talk to me again. So in 50% of my grades mind I am probably "poo boy" or something lol. Sometimes this cute Asian girl tries to flirt with me, but of course I smile and nod then run away to the corner of the room like my backside is on fire lol. I frequently catch girls staring at me, but unfortunately I cant exactly flirt back can I? Anyway, school is terrible.
My family situation is not good. My family lie to me (just a note, I dont blame my family for lying to me. If my sister or mum had BB I wouldnt tell them if they asked and I would cover my nose around them ((we are only human)) and probably avoid them. I went to see Skyfall with my family the other day and boy did my dad react. He oriented his whole body away from me. (You know, your screwed when your own family avoid you lol ((I think I will mostly see movies by myself now)) ). My dad seems to have this philosophy engraved into his head "My son (me) lives in an upper middle class caucasian family in a first world country so therefore he should not have any problems and if he does they are stupid" (my dad isnt a moron, hes just a bit closed minded). So if I bring up my BB he lashes back saying something like "its the time of your life and your worried about bad breath?". So what do I do? go to my mum. My mum is a lovely woman. She semi-admits I have BB and is willing to help me, she makes doctors appointments for me and really tries to help me. But when I get sad and cry to her she also gets really sad, more than me and is depressed for the next few days until I tell her im ok. So I guess I cant really cry to any of my parents, but I have so much crying to do due to my bad breath and severe anxiety. (This is a really sad story: a few days ago I got my report card from school I got 6 As and 2 Bs and my parents were ecstatic my mum was glowing! But I thought to myself "what are all these good marks worth when I wont be able to get a job because of my BB" so I just started to cry and my mum got so sad. She would have been glowing for days but I just went ahead and ruined it all for her, i was so guilty). My extended family think im rude because I never talk to them, but really its just the BB. However, I have one cousin that I go on holiday with every so often and we play videogames together for a week and have BBQs and stuff which is a pretty big break from depressing school. He reacts to my BB but he puts up with it pretty well, considering we are around eachother 90% of the day. The family situation is not too great
My biggest concern is my future. I know it will be hard to work in an office or with lots of other people so I am probably going to need an outdoors or home job. I will join the army reserve, but that is not enough to support me (20,000 a year) and I am not good enough to join the full time army. I am a good writer and my school wants to publish a short story I wrote in some book, so writing could be a career that I could do from home. But besides that, I dont know what I could do The one thing that eats away at me is the idea that I will probably not get a wife or kids. Not many girls will put up with BB like I have.
Im going start by saying I havent really been dealt good cards in my life. I have crippling anxiety and of course, severe bad breath. And they dont mix very well together to say the least. And ive come to realise that I will probably not be cured. i simply dont know what to do with myself. I am very quiet and I dont talk very much to anyone except my friends at school (having this problem as a 16 year old is TORTURE btw). Two of my friends know about my problem, but they are ok with it, they still chat to me and stuff. I have one friend outside of school who I am super close with and he has a 20% sense of smell most of the time which is great. I have another very close friend and he puts up with me pretty well, he likes it when i sit next to him despite my problem. So my friend situation is pretty good
However, school itself SUCKS. Class is terrible. Whoever I sit next to covers their noses and when I sit next to a girl I cant even concentrate because I know I am disgusting them. So in about 40-50% of my classes I sit alone, if I have friends in my class I sit with them. I am pretty unpopular and I dont really talk to anyone outside of my group. Some people only know me for my BB, they smell it, then dont talk to me again. So in 50% of my grades mind I am probably "poo boy" or something lol. Sometimes this cute Asian girl tries to flirt with me, but of course I smile and nod then run away to the corner of the room like my backside is on fire lol. I frequently catch girls staring at me, but unfortunately I cant exactly flirt back can I? Anyway, school is terrible.
My family situation is not good. My family lie to me (just a note, I dont blame my family for lying to me. If my sister or mum had BB I wouldnt tell them if they asked and I would cover my nose around them ((we are only human)) and probably avoid them. I went to see Skyfall with my family the other day and boy did my dad react. He oriented his whole body away from me. (You know, your screwed when your own family avoid you lol ((I think I will mostly see movies by myself now)) ). My dad seems to have this philosophy engraved into his head "My son (me) lives in an upper middle class caucasian family in a first world country so therefore he should not have any problems and if he does they are stupid" (my dad isnt a moron, hes just a bit closed minded). So if I bring up my BB he lashes back saying something like "its the time of your life and your worried about bad breath?". So what do I do? go to my mum. My mum is a lovely woman. She semi-admits I have BB and is willing to help me, she makes doctors appointments for me and really tries to help me. But when I get sad and cry to her she also gets really sad, more than me and is depressed for the next few days until I tell her im ok. So I guess I cant really cry to any of my parents, but I have so much crying to do due to my bad breath and severe anxiety. (This is a really sad story: a few days ago I got my report card from school I got 6 As and 2 Bs and my parents were ecstatic my mum was glowing! But I thought to myself "what are all these good marks worth when I wont be able to get a job because of my BB" so I just started to cry and my mum got so sad. She would have been glowing for days but I just went ahead and ruined it all for her, i was so guilty). My extended family think im rude because I never talk to them, but really its just the BB. However, I have one cousin that I go on holiday with every so often and we play videogames together for a week and have BBQs and stuff which is a pretty big break from depressing school. He reacts to my BB but he puts up with it pretty well, considering we are around eachother 90% of the day. The family situation is not too great
My biggest concern is my future. I know it will be hard to work in an office or with lots of other people so I am probably going to need an outdoors or home job. I will join the army reserve, but that is not enough to support me (20,000 a year) and I am not good enough to join the full time army. I am a good writer and my school wants to publish a short story I wrote in some book, so writing could be a career that I could do from home. But besides that, I dont know what I could do The one thing that eats away at me is the idea that I will probably not get a wife or kids. Not many girls will put up with BB like I have.