What you people do if you are lonely, how you cope with it

Post by **Jimi Stein** » Tue Mar 25, 2014 8:27 pm

I am sure most of use are very lonely people. How you deal with it?

NOTANYMORE · Post by **NOTANYMORE** » Wed Mar 26, 2014 12:29 am

That's an interesting question. My uncle was visiting this weekend and likes to ask alot of questions. The question was asked if I had buddies that I got together with or close friends. I hadn't given it a whole lot of thought untill that question was asked and it made me realise just how vacant much of my life has become. I literaly have zero "friends", only a bunch of people I say hello to every day.
Fortunatly I have a wife and small child to force me out of constant depression and the self loathing that can come with this affliction. Another thing I have is online gaming. I talk and interact with many people online using a headset while playing my xbox and I literaly forget all my problems for a couple of hours a night. I'm interested to hear how others fill their time as well.

oneday4800 · Post by **oneday4800** » Wed Mar 26, 2014 3:16 am

I actually have people to hang out with but I'll be so uncomfortable and wouldn't even be able to enjoy myself so I don't bother. I love reading. Keeps my mind busy. I go for runs when I feel brave enough to possibly breathe in someone's face. Games,tv, texting and cooking. That's about it I think

Ihatemybreath · Post by **Ihatemybreath** » Thu Mar 27, 2014 12:12 am

You just have ASSUMED that we are lonely? You, as the adm of this forum should help us with good toughts not make depressing topics like this one

sandspiegel · Post by **sandspiegel** » Thu Mar 27, 2014 1:07 am

I was single for about 6 years, mainly because of bb. My luck is that I have a couple of really great friends that would go out with me almost every weekend despite my problem...
However sometimes I got really lonely and desperate especially when I saw that my friends had girlfriends or when I saw how they could talk in close proximity to girls (especially talking straight to their faces) and there was no reaction from the girls. For them it's perfectly normal but for me it's the thing I wished most in life, talking to people and not get the weird reactions we bb sufferers know of so well.
From time to time I got really lonely but that feeling usually went away after a couple of days or weeks, especially if I occupied my mind with some other hobby or activity.
Then about 1 year ago a friend of mine asked me if I know that one girl and that she finds me pretty interesting. She was/is really pretty but I had to decline because of my bb problem (of course I told my friend that I don't want a relationship right now, not mentioning a word of my true problem). Then about 6 months later I was partying with that same friend at a club and he saw that same girl at the club. So he said to me, let's go say hello, and the only thing I could think of was:" I can't talk to her, if she smells what is coming out of my mouth, she will lose interest in me for sure".
However, we got over there and as I talked to her, I tried to talk to her ear (not straight to her face, since the music was also loud). It kinda worked, she seemed to respond pretty well. So we exchanged numbers and talked a lot for about a month through massaging. Then I finally had the courage to ask her out.

The day we met, I had a crazy ass mouth cleaning routine, brushing my teeth twice. Using TerraBreath mouthwash + Gel as much as I could.
Of course when we met I also had a chewing gum in my mouth to not scare her away.
However after the first Date I quickly realized that I can't be with her while having my bb problem.
So I started to search the internet again for another product that might help me. Through a coincidence I stumbled upon Tung Brush + Gel in a German Forum and ordered it. Well to make a long story short, this product is keeping me above water right now. It is the only thing allowing me to have this relationship that I'm in right now. The first true kiss we had was about a couple of weeks after I started to use Tung Brush + Gel and boy was I nervous. I didn't kiss a girl in such a long time and was still so afraid that she would give me a weird reaction but it didn't happen until now.
However I still have this fear of talking straight to her face which is a habit I developed while having my bb problem.

So this is my little story and I hope it might give someone here hope. To be honest I started to think that I won't be finding anybody and die alone but here I am. I often wonder however what the hell I'm gonna do if the product stops working? The answer is: I have absolutely no freakin Idea! So yeah I pretty much enjoy it while it lasts (which I hope will continue to do so but who knows?)

Some of you guys said that you have a wife and kids. How did you get to know each other despite your bb problem. Would be really interesting to know.

bblady · Post by **bblady** » Wed Apr 02, 2014 12:07 am

I am one of those individuals who is alone most of the time because of bad breath. People avoid me because of my breath odor. I barely speak at my job because I work in a room with no air ventilation, and my breath odor can and often does drive people to leave the room when I talk, so I work in silence and only speak when it is absolutely necessary. I've never worked a 9-5 job. I'm lucky in that I can work overnights instead, as there are fewer people around. My coworkers prefer it when I'm quiet. I have no social life, but I never really had much of one anyway, as I was never popular. I'm fortunate, in that I'm not one of those people who every had the need for a social life. I was always a social misfit, often misunderstood and avoided simply for being an oddball and gay. I learned early in life that we don't need acceptance in order to feel worthy or even normal. I take pride in being true to myself, screw what other people think. Those rough experiences I endured from my childhood and teenage years prepared me for the present, when my bad breath started, which was almost 10 years ago. I am in my mid 40s and am in a wonderful marriage.

I recommend finding hobbies and sticking with a schedule to keep your mind active. Find things that make you happy. We only have 1 life and you have to live it, even if you live it alone. We are lucky in that we are living with computers and the internet, it gives us the ability to socialize with others, but virtually. It's better than nothing at all.

I don't feel alone even though I am alone most of the time because of my work schedule. I know that by staying active, busy and finding things to look forward to doing are the best ways to deal with the lonely feeling. My hobbies are cooking, exercise, playing the accordion and taking care of my 2 pet rabbits.

Take care everyone, and love who you are no matter what others think. My first role model in life was Boy George and he once said, "any kind of love is good love and that you shouldn't care what other people think". He was so right. It applies.

FedUp · Post by **FedUp** » Wed Apr 23, 2014 6:02 pm

I get lonely at times. I always have people asking me to go places but I cannot bare to be around people with this condition. I've pushed away alot of people and naturally they think i do not like them which isn't the case. how badly i would love to just say "hey lets go do something" without worrying or wondering how badly i smell. i'd love to sit and eat with someone but no.

Post by **Jimi Stein** » Thu Apr 24, 2014 12:38 am

you are lucky, nobody asks me out anymore, it does not happen anymore, I have no friends, what a wonderful life

Ihatemybreath · Post by **Ihatemybreath** » Fri Apr 25, 2014 6:34 pm

Wow, Im sorry for my last post in this topic, I was on my happy-bitch-I-think-Im-cured period. Just responding to the question: When Im lonely I read and watch TV series and movies. It is great. But obviously I miss human contact. I have just ONE friend, but, oh, well.

Ruinedlife3 · Post by **Ruinedlife3** » Mon Jun 23, 2014 9:54 am

I find myself in the same weird place that some other posters have described. I still somehow have people asking me to do things and hang out. It's funny (if I can have a brief moment) because I find myself thinking, "Why the hell would you want me around? Are you crazy? Do you not smell what's coming out of my putrid mouth?" lol Anyway, I still have a few people that want me around for whatever reason. I think it's because I'm really nice.

I'm somewhat good-looking, so girls are interested. As Sandspiegel described, however, I always just say that I don't want relationships and that I'm focusing on work or school (when I was still a student). I got a girl's phone number a few weeks ago and just stopped calling her. This is what happens often, btw. I get a phone number and then realize that there is no way I could hide this forever. Even if I get past the first date or two, it's always only a matter of time before I get exposed.

So, I'm locked in my room often trying to bang out some writing. I watch a lot of movies and sports. I used to play games online, but that got boring. My social life is mainly twitter with all the anonymous folks on there. I still avoid family functions. I have two sisters that haven't seen me in years (literally). I'm saving up for a camera now so that I can start traveling to places alone and just taking pictures of things I like. "This forum may become part of my routine as well.

Post by **Jimi Stein** » Mon Jun 23, 2014 10:17 am

I was like that in univestiry and secondary school. Did not want to date, always thinking I will date when I will fix bb, but that day never come. BB is getting worse and now that I want to date, I cant....

so do not be naive, go and date, have good memorieds, maybe you wil end up in the same way as I am in the future, who knows

sandspiegel · Post by **sandspiegel** » Thu Jun 26, 2014 3:55 pm

Jimi Stein wrote:I was like that in univestiry and secondary school. Did not want to date, always thinking I will date when I will fix bb, but that day never come. BB is getting worse and now that I want to date, I cant....

so do not be naive, go and date, have good memorieds, maybe you wil end up in the same way as I am in the future, who knows

How old are you if it`s not a secret? Did you had bb all your life?

Me and my ex-girlfriend I described in this thread about 3 months ago quit about a month ago. It's always the same sh*t. I can't hold on to a relationship more than 3 months or so. I cannot put myself to full potential when it comes to women and relationships because of my problem and sooner or later they lose interest in me. Because my mind is so fu**ed up with this problem it's a big problem for me to just kiss like normal couples do especially in the beginning of relationships. I also can't talk in peoples faces because of this fu**ed up inhibition that I have since I'm a child and since someone first told me about my problem.

I think that in this life I'm going to stay single because I can't be in a normal healthy relationship when I can't even kiss the girl I'm with or talk to her face.
I still have my great friends and my hobbies. If there is something like a next Life then I just hope that I'm gonna be born without this curse.

Post by **Jimi Stein** » Fri Jun 27, 2014 5:23 pm

same shit happening to me, together with a girl for few months, then break up.....