I'll try and be brief-ish.
I first noticed that I had BB in the summer of 2011. Every time I was around friends they seemed to constantly be touching their noses. Often, I would hug someone and they would do their best to make sure our faces didn't touch - turning their head so to be furthest away from my mouth.
TBH, I hadn't always had the best oral hygiene before 2011: Brush in the morning and at night (but not always), no gargling or flossing, ever. I was also a smoker. But there had never been any breath issues. Then, in the summer of 2011, I got this weird stomach bacterial infection, and was passing a plastic like substance through my back passage. After some tests was told I had high white cell count and given a ton of meds to take. I also discovered my left tonsil was ridiculously swollen (it's never returned to it's normal size. Never told what the crap in my ...er...crap was. Looked like my stomach lining!
Fast forward: I didn't pay too much attention to it, figured it was just a temporary thing that would go away it didn't. I became much more oral hygiene conscientious, but still not obsessive (as I am now). It was hard to accept that all of a sudden I had developed offensive mouth odor! But the reactions became impossible to ignore. Shop staff, small kids, check out girl...all having reactions. I started to realise that every person I came into contact with on a daily basis was exhibiting some kind of reaction. Some people where kind - many people took to talking with one finger permanently placed under their nose.
later 2011 - I met a guy and we feel in love - but even he, I noticed, often scratched his nose around mw, and would find away to obstruct one nostril if we were talking close for too long. Somehow this didn't effective us physically (we had other issues), and when asked, he said he did not smell anything. He never touched his nose when talking to my friends. I also asked another GP friend, who also said they couldn't smell anything - but two people out of several I encounter daily, some several times per week. I couldn't ignore it.
I stopped speaking as much. Then I noticed it was also coming from my nostrils. If I breathed in and out deeply, people would open car windows when we drove, move further down the line away from me...and the kids (they don't even try to hide it) would straight cover their faces, this might have been the worse. If the kids who i'm several feet taller than are smelling it...it's there. PERIOD!
I thought it may have been some impacted lower wisdom teeth - so as I was in thailand and could get the op done relatively inexpensively I got them both done on local anaesthetic on the same day (bad idea for soooo many reasons). I was having daily irrigation appointments and it took a while for the gaps to close. I thought that would be the end of it!
Far from it. Within a few weeks of using the healing as a valid reason for not 'smelling the best orally', the gaps closed...and ..as you can imagine..I was back to square one.
I started to brush my teeth several times a day. Morning, afternoon, after food (100% before meeting friends, usually with my travel toothpaste and a bottle of water directly as close as possible as where we're meeting. Before bed.
I noticed social occasions started to take place to which I was not invited, and social groups/cliches were forming in which i was never really encouraged to be part of. I'm already a bit of a loner by nature; I work online so can spend several hours each and every day only communicating via email and skype. I also started to test how those people spoke with me via seeing only communications. No had to touch their nose every 5/10 minutes!
Mood wise, things have been rapidly deteriorating. Mainly it's this intensive feeling of sadness. Unwillingness to share, laugh, get close, or show affection - not wanting to experience half hearted hugs and luke warm receptions. My gran died this year, I came home for the funeral. All my family members where constantly touching noses, including grieving grandfather. Then I stayed at my aunt's house one night, and when I came out of the bathroom after brushing my teeth, she was like "that was quick?" (it was her way of saying, "brush more and stink mouth goes away"). Not true! It was probably the 5th time I'd brushed my teeth that day.
Now I try to avoid as many social situations as possible. But i'm an outgoing, extroverted person by nature. I like to laugh, get close, be warm and affectionate with people, but I can't anymore. Always sucking on mints (can't stand them), always popping gum (which doesn't agree with my digestive system). Always talking at an angle...or trying to position myself at the farthest distance from their face, but even then...the reactions.
I hate interacting with people...and feel ashamed because BB in others is something I too find really tough to deal with and be around, so as much as their reactions hurt me...I fundamentally understand it!
I've recently started dating a super cute, super affectionate guy, who although has reactions, but seems to be able handle it (ugggh...handle your gf's breath, how embarrassing). However, I hate being around his friends, they all have reactions.How humiliating for him..bet they are talking behind back about his "smelly girlfiriend" uggh.
This is making it hard for me to emotionally and physically intimate with him - in close quarters he often needs to find a way to get some respite from it - he's very considerate, but I'm also very aware. I know what he's doing. When interacting with his friends - he never does those same avoidance tactics.
The other morning - he handed me 1/2 a breath gum (I'd just brushed my teeth) I was devastated, even though it was done in a loving way. I'm scared of getting to close, getting my feelings totally destroyed...I mean being dumped for BB is soul destroyin', right!
I used to think it was solely oral. I stopped using listerine type mouth washes - bought
very expensive dioxibrite mouth was and toothpaste (extremely embarrassing to have in the bathroom as you clearly have a problem, and a nightmare to take on short breaks as takes up half packing space. I have also modified my diet to remove nearly all sugar and carbds (and lost 10kg with it)
My routine:
- brush more 5-8 minutes
scrap tongue - go back far as gag reflex will allow
floss (often when I floss between tooth with crown it smells foul, but nothing like my lick test (sour and foul - or fishy and foul - or acidic and foul )
try and eat as soon as waking, as hunger just makes mine much worse
drink as much water as possible
use manual pic to get any stubborn food in top back molar
gargle with two part dioxibrite mouth wash - usually for a minute of two
I probably have the best oral hygiene of anyone I know - but doesn't stop them from thinking I just don't maintain myself well.
Also, when I touch my pitted awkwardly shaped tonsils, they stink - but no tonsil stones I can see. I've also had several ENTS examine my tonsils, and they never mentioned stones.
I've started to think it could be tonsil/oesophageal, lung, or gut related. I mean you can smell it when my mouth is closed through my breath. Also if I've been silent for long...it's the first thing you smell when I open my mouth.
Now I never leave the house without mints - I pop an embarrassing amount - it's clear I'm aware I have a problem. Carry a brush and paste in my bag and will brush my teeth mid party - even though it doesn't help much. I was recently in a club and stopped by this guy who said : you're so beautiful", I went to say thank you and he immediately covered his mouth and nose (as did his female friend). I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me. I'm already dealing with low mood and depression due to long term chronic insomnia-- which makes the mental strength needed to face this each day even harder to manifest.
Today, I met a stranger who had helped me out of a very horrible situation on a train, and I immediately went up to hug her...I was so grateful...she hugged me deeply the way emotionally open people do...and within seconds of sitting with her and her friends...the reactions. I was too much, I left.
I have a lot of long term digestion issues (resulting in lots of burping), and have tarry stools, so looking into hpolyori, but otherwise flat out of ideas and energy.
Going to try and get some peroxide and baking soda tomorrow and order a water pik - but other than that - I'm drawing a blank. My life at 34yrs old is now severely restricted by not only low energy and mood from insomnia - but even when I do feel up to socialising, I have to deal with having BB and the burden it puts on those around me. And yes, it is a burden. I had a teacher who had it, and she was hard work. Luckily, her classes were also my favourite, so although I didn't get too close to often, I always showed up. Now I feel terrible for her...that must have been so tough. She had fecal matter breath.
I need to find a way over this before I become a hermit. I work from home, so it's easy to isolate, but I love people, and I want to love my life again.
I know this was a bit of a rant (hopefully not in wrong forum), but I needed to get if off my heart. It feels so heavy today. I try not to let it get me down, but I'm already down.
All help is appreciated. Reading the candid, helpful posts of the commenters and sharers here lets me know I'm not alone. I appreciate you. sorry for the length of this post