What do you do about your badbreath during Intimacy?

[Kd1994]

I mean you have to be so close to the person all in each others face. What do you do? Even with kissing. Also, if you answer could you state how bad you bb is. I mean I haven't had to be that close to anyone but just the thought stresses me to no end. I'm a female so I'm especially looking at the answers from the ladies but guys feel free to share.

[Smilingagain]

Dear Kd1994, it looks like you've not been active on this forum.

When i saw the subject of this thread, i said to myself that this must be from a female. So, i had to check just to confirm my prediction.

I'm not trying to be male chauvinist because all of us are in same boat here. I know ACCEPTANCE (ATTENTION) is onething that any person suffering from bad breath will need .
Unfortunately, this is not so.

So, onething which i learnt to deal with is :

- REJECTION ( your happiness should not depend on approval of third-party)
- NEGATIVE OPINION of other's

In answer to you question, talking about intimacy (when dating, for someone in relationship..) you will need to open-up to someone who can truely understand you and what you are going through.

*In rarely cases, someone who truely understand you will learn to stay by you.

Thanks
Smilinagain

[Kd1994]

You make sense Smilinagain. Yes you are right I am a female. Hopefully I have one of those rare ones you mentioned but we'll see. Thanks for your honesty.

[Smilingagain]

You are welcome @Kd1994

Pls, be couragious because this is the only attitude which can help break us away from bb.
Meanwhile, i will suggest you check out one of my thread in regard's to masking bad breath reference link : viewtopic.php?f=1&t=7462&p=65303#p65303

Regard's
Smilinagain

[Cres]

Personally I was really lucky to have found a girlfriend this year that does not detect the breath odor. On the other hand I'm immensely unlucky because most people at work for instance, detect it. So you can imagine what kind of things they say behind my back. I'm out of ideas on how to cure my BB. I was tested twice for TMAU (among other things) and results came back negative, but the problem persists. To answer your question Kd1994, depending on the origin of your BB you can either mask it and/or try your luck with people, while still looking for a solution.

[simple]

Does your gf not detect the bb at all? Does she know that you have it - at least, from the reactions of others? Does she have a decreased sense of smell in general or only towards your bb?
That is intriguing and might point to a metabolic origin of it if you have bb from both mouth & breathing. I remember reading about some people who have compromised function of TMO enzyme being less sensitive to the smell of those with TMAU. It might be a similar thing with other metabolic syndromes... (given that you don’t have TMAU) What do you think?

Personally I was really lucky to have found a girlfriend this year that does not detect the breath odor. On the other hand I'm immensely unlucky because most people at work for instance, detect it. So you can imagine what kind of things they say behind my back. I'm out of ideas on how to cure my BB. I was tested twice for TMAU (among other things) and results came back negative, but the problem persists. To answer your question Kd1994, depending on the origin of your BB you can either mask it and/or try your luck with people, while still looking for a solution.

[Cres]

Does your gf not detect the bb at all? Does she know that you have it - at least, from the reactions of others? Does she have a decreased sense of smell in general or only towards your bb?
That is intriguing and might point to a metabolic origin of it if you have bb from both mouth & breathing. I remember reading about some people who have compromised function of TMO enzyme being less sensitive to the smell of those with TMAU. It might be a similar thing with other metabolic syndromes... (given that you don’t have TMAU) What do you think?

Thank you for asking Yeah, her sense of smell is completely normal and never detects by BB. I've told her about other peoples' reactions and she finds it odd, but understands it makes me depressed. My first gf had reactions. My estimate is that at least 10% of strangers (or people not related to me) can smell it. I differentiate strangers because my whole immediate family can smell it, they have reactions and have given nasty comments. This is either some weird systemic problem similar to TMAU or we don't really understand the sense of smell as good as we could, yet. I was tested for TMAU twice and a bunch of other gene mutations with the same test, but no positive results. I just started another job and I already feel excluded from most social interactions in there. One HR worker had a really strong reaction to my BB, she backed up and then looked as if she was sick. Then there's one guy also has reactions, not as severe, but he doesn't like to talk to me. My life is a nightmare. I'll probably die unemployed, having said goodbye to my gf, unless I find out what's wrong.

[simple]

Cres, don’t despair! Your gf doesn’t detect it, so you can consider yourself lucky , as most ppl with bb from early age have to be single forever

Interestingly, I also can testify that people vary so much in their reactions! Some people sneeze all the time since they just caught a glimpse of you and run away into oblivion as fast as they can (hey, that looks even funny ). And some can be around close & talk without negative reactions (but those are rare). However, it could also partly be due to the latter folk being just polite. But in general, I agree that people vary in their ability to smell our bb and in their reactions. You said “at least 10% of strangers can smell it” - that seems like a very low number, maybe you wanted to type “10% can’t smell”?

From my limited social experience, I remember some of my long lost friends actually seemed not to smell anything! Like zero reactions, went upclose, hugged while greeting, talked for ages, weren’t repulsed whatsoever, leaned in while talking as if I was like everyone else. The two of my friends - I really thought their noses weren’t working but maybe it’s same as with your gf. When I asked them they didn’t know what I was talking about (i hope it’s true). Some other friends also weren’t repulsed / bothered by my bb whatsover and they seemed not able to smell, but then would do the toilet/fart pun at me all of a sudden... It’s something hard to wrap you head around: how one person smells bb from 5 feet away & seems nauseous and the other can literally hug you & sit next to you?!

Regarding your job: their discomfort is really not your responsibility! The only solution for us is to bring value by doing good job and having friendly & kind personality - then, some people can overlook the flaw of bb... I think some people (minority) understand that chronic bb is not something we can (easily) change, so they can be empathetic. Our job is to look for those people while trying to maintain positive interactions with others & ignoring the jerks. I wouldn’t say this approach will make people like you, but there will be the odd few who will tolerate you & could like you for the kind of person you are.

Which genes are you referring to? Did you rule out the possibility of SELENBP-1 mutation? How did you test for them? Do you have any relatives with bb?

Thank you for asking Yeah, her sense of smell is completely normal and never detects by BB. I've told her about other peoples' reactions and she finds it odd, but understands it makes me depressed. My first gf had reactions. My estimate is that at least 10% of strangers (or people not related to me) can smell it. I differentiate strangers because my whole immediate family can smell it, they have reactions and have given nasty comments. This is either some weird systemic problem similar to TMAU or we don't really understand the sense of smell as good as we could, yet. I was tested for TMAU twice and a bunch of other gene mutations with the same test, but no positive results. I just started another job and I already feel excluded from most social interactions in there. One HR worker had a really strong reaction to my BB, she backed up and then looked as if she was sick. Then there's one guy also has reactions, not as severe, but he doesn't like to talk to me. My life is a nightmare. I'll probably die unemployed, having said goodbye to my gf, unless I find out what's wrong.

[Cres]

Cres, don’t despair! Your gf doesn’t detect it, so you can consider yourself lucky , as most ppl with bb from early age have to be single forever

Interestingly, I also can testify that people vary so much in their reactions! Some people sneeze all the time since they just caught a glimpse of you and run away into oblivion as fast as they can (hey, that looks even funny ). And some can be around close & talk without negative reactions (but those are rare). However, it could also partly be due to the latter folk being just polite. But in general, I agree that people vary in their ability to smell our bb and in their reactions. You said “at least 10% of strangers can smell it” - that seems like a very low number, maybe you wanted to type “10% can’t smell”?

From my limited social experience, I remember some of my long lost friends actually seemed not to smell anything! Like zero reactions, went upclose, hugged while greeting, talked for ages, weren’t repulsed whatsoever, leaned in while talking as if I was like everyone else. The two of my friends - I really thought their noses weren’t working but maybe it’s same as with your gf. When I asked them they didn’t know what I was talking about (i hope it’s true). Some other friends also weren’t repulsed / bothered by my bb whatsover and they seemed not able to smell, but then would do the toilet/fart pun at me all of a sudden... It’s something hard to wrap you head around: how one person smells bb from 5 feet away & seems nauseous and the other can literally hug you & sit next to you?!

Regarding your job: their discomfort is really not your responsibility! The only solution for us is to bring value by doing good job and having friendly & kind personality - then, some people can overlook the flaw of bb... I think some people (minority) understand that chronic bb is not something we can (easily) change, so they can be empathetic. Our job is to look for those people while trying to maintain positive interactions with others & ignoring the jerks. I wouldn’t say this approach will make people like you, but there will be the odd few who will tolerate you & could like you for the kind of person you are.

Which genes are you referring to? Did you rule out the possibility of SELENBP-1 mutation? How did you test for them? Do you have any relatives with bb?

Yes, it's been my strategy now that I don't interact with nasty employees unless I absolutely have to in order to do a good job. The 10% is my estimate of the lowest percentage of people that can smell it. It could be as high as 40%, but in my experience not much higher than that. So in that sense I guess I'm lucky that not everyone can smell my extraoral BB, but in workplace settings for example, it takes only one person to start rumours behind my back, causing most or all of them peaking behind my back even if they can't personally smell the BB. So it's really like roulette when I meet new people: do they instantly dislike me or not. Which also makes (or made) dating very difficult.

I can't really remember if I had any close friends who didn't detect my BB. Probably a few? Most did anyway. My BB could have been different (even worse?) when I was younger but I somehow doubt it. This started when I was 12, gradually got worse until I was 15 and it's been as bad ever since, for almost 16 years.

It looks like SELENBP-1 mutation was tested on me at the same time if I understood correctly. I can share the whole report with you I can seem to only attach three pages to this post in this forum, so here they are in Google Drive. If these links are not allowed then I'll upload them later to another place or share pictures via personal message

Page one: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1p57DOM ... sp=sharing
Page two: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1LXwb2C ... sp=sharing
Page three: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zgAUz2 ... sp=sharing
Page four: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zA5cPD ... sp=sharing
Page five: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Joj5Fu ... sp=sharing
Page six: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vquGN0 ... sp=sharing

[simple]

Hi Cres, thanks for sharing the pictures I guess it gives you a peace of mind now that you don’t have to worry about the genetic causes. Did you contact the lab yourself or were referred by a doctor? How much did it cost if you remember?

It’s interesting that such low number of people can smell your bb As far as I know the olfactory system is quite varied among individuals. One example being some people can’t smell the smell of asparagus in urine at all, whereas for me it seems to be insanely strong. Of course, it’s just one example, there are other known and unknown variations in olfactory capacities. Maybe your bb is due to compounds that are not smelt by everyone. Or maybe it’s due to compounds commonly found in other people as well but in lower quantities (you know like carriers of fmo3 mutations have reduced ability to smell people with tmau; but of course, it’s not that in your case).

The low number you gave is really perplexing for me, because I only ever met a few people who couldn’t smell.

Yes, it's been my strategy now that I don't interact with nasty employees unless I absolutely have to in order to do a good job. The 10% is my estimate of the lowest percentage of people that can smell it. It could be as high as 40%, but in my experience not much higher than that. So in that sense I guess I'm lucky that not everyone can smell my extraoral BB, but in workplace settings for example, it takes only one person to start rumours behind my back, causing most or all of them peaking behind my back even if they can't personally smell the BB. So it's really like roulette when I meet new people: do they instantly dislike me or not. Which also makes (or made) dating very difficult.

I can't really remember if I had any close friends who didn't detect my BB. Probably a few? Most did anyway. My BB could have been different (even worse?) when I was younger but I somehow doubt it. This started when I was 12, gradually got worse until I was 15 and it's been as bad ever since, for almost 16 years.

It looks like SELENBP-1 mutation was tested on me at the same time if I understood correctly. I can share the whole report with you I can seem to only attach three pages to this post in this forum, so here they are in Google Drive. If these links are not allowed then I'll upload them later to another place or share pictures via personal message

Page one: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1p57DOM ... sp=sharing
Page two: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1LXwb2C ... sp=sharing
Page three: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zgAUz2 ... sp=sharing
Page four: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zA5cPD ... sp=sharing
Page five: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Joj5Fu ... sp=sharing
Page six: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vquGN0 ... sp=sharing