Bad Breath Halitosis Forum

Hey gals and guys, what's up?

I found this site a while ago, however, I've now decided to join and share my experiences and to learn.

In this post however, I'm going to share my experiences. It is geared for men especially, but women are welcome to give feedback also, it's always nice to hear from you all.

I'm a male, and I have bad breath. However, I know the cause of my bad breath...cavities But, my current financial position will not allow me to get them filled. So, for the past 4-5 years, and now, my breath stinks. This is a fact, no phobia, no illusions. A young woman, I went out with, let me know in no uncertain terms. She said, and I quote "your breath stinks" My nephew told me my breath stinks (children are the greatest source of truth) I get the windows down in a car routine, people covering their nose, pulling away from my face, the whole 9 yards. So, I know I have the bb condition.

As a guy, (I can't talk for all men, but I'm sure that at least some can relate) I'm not to much concerned about the affect my bad breath has on my relationships with men (although, being accepted among mature men, is an integral part in your journey of becoming a man) BUT what affects me more, as a man is the effect my condition has on WOMEN. Turning off men is one thing, but women is another.

Some years ago, it seemed to me, that it is my bad breath that led me to being single, to being miserable, to being lonely and most importantly kept me from entering a meaningful, loving and tender relationship. How can a woman stand my breath? I can't even stand it and I can't stand people near to me, with bad breath, although mine was just as bad or worse than the next halitosis victim.

HOWEVER, I'm the bearer of good news. My problem WAS NOT my bad breath, it was WHAT my bb had made me become. Bitter, cynical, pushing away people who were trying to get close, because of fear of being hurt, becoming antisocial, because you don't want people to smell your breath. It was this women were rejecting. Now, this is not to say, that my bad breath had no effect on women, but that it was NOT the main thing that women rejected.

I'm here to tell you THAT YOU CAN be confident, cool and have a good social life AND have a relationship, even if your breath smell like crap literally. Read on bro.

Something about women

Women are marvelous creatures, but, at the same time, hard to understand and very complex. However, for the last few years or so, I've made a conscious effort to try and understand them. And, I can say, I now better understand them. This understanding came form both experience, reading and talking to other women and listening to, watching and hanging out with other men that are successful with women. However, my recent experiences with women, has led me to believe that bad breath, when it comes to most women, is NOT what turns them off and, as men that suffer with bad breath learning this is VITAL in enjoying good relationships relationships with women, and with men. Now, this is NOT to say, that there are NO women, that are turned off by bad breath, they are that have good teeth, healthy mouths as a "trait" that they must require a man to have. And, this is NOT an excuse to stop looking for remedies to our problems. HOWEVER, there are more important things, that women look for in a man, that, if present, bad breath would seem like nothing. Yes, even if it smells like crap. Read on.

The difference in how women and men think

The first thing that men notice in women are their looks. This is often the deciding factor in if a man is attracted to a woman, if she is hot. We have terms and phrases for this. Like for instance, the scale from 1-10 in which we rate woman, "hot" pretty etc. Most men are driven by looks, appearance, sexiness etc.

However, women focus on personality and other traits first and then looks after. This is not to say that looks are not important (what's more important to women is a well groomed man) but that women are driven by personality traits rather than looks, unlike men. Confidence, having goals in life, good sense of humor (being cocky, etc) being assertive (not power hungry) good body language, strong sense of identity, emotionally stable and being a "bad boy" traits are traits that make women literally go "bonkers" over men that display these traits. Even men with breath that smells like rotten cottage cheese. Women on this board with no doubt confirm what I have said

When next you go into the city, look at couples, look at the hot women, then look at the men they are with. Without a doubt, some of them will be handsome, but most of them will be average, and even what society would call "ugly" yet they have hot women around their arms. This is because, some of these men display the traits named above, and then some. Women are just not hooked up on looks appearance, etc as much as us men. And, the funny thing is that, WOMEN themselves may not even know this about themselves. All matters is how you make a woman feel. And, those traits above, triggers feelings and emotions in a woman, that even SHE cannot control (I have experienced this) This is why women stay in abusive relationship, or go with guys that they KNOW are players, or leave out nice guys for jerks etc. Because they portray certain traits and make them feel a certain way.

What turns off women

1) Being clingy and needy. Any time you show a girl you NEED her, then it's over, bad breath or fresh breath, it does not matter. Don't be needy or clingy.

2) Being insecure and lacking confidence. Women can smell insecurity and no confidence. And fear of women smelling our breath, can make us break eye contact, which is a sure sign of insecurity!

3) Not having goals in life. Major turnoff for women.

4) Being emotionally weak.

5) Letting her walk all over you. Yes, women LOVE to have their way but are TURNED off by men who GIVE THEM THEIR OWN WAY, strange I know.

6) Not having a backbone, not standing up for your self

7) Calling her too often

These are only some of the major turnoffs. Now bad breath IS something BAD, so it CAN be a turnoff to some women. But,in my experience, if MORE positive traits are present in you, BB will not be a HUGE problem.

What this means for US BB guys

Simple, focus on developing these traits, and attracting women will take care of itself, EVEN in the midst of poo breath. I've seen it and experienced this happening. Now this does not mean you ignore your BB you should always look for a remedy, clean breath is ALWAYS better than stink breath.

My expereinces

Now, as I said before, I'm poor right now, so I cannot afford to fill all my cavities. So, I decided, instead of focusing on the cavities, I decided to CHANGE what I can, that is my insecurities, my INTERNAL issues, my confidence problems, poor self image etc. I decided to set goals in life, develop and sharpen a sense of humor, learn to control my emotions, improve my body language, learn more about life, read good books, etc. And, as for looking for women, I decided not to look for women, BUT to focus on MY goals in life, reaching them by any means necessary (this is a MAJOR turn on for women)

Results Results Results

TO my surprise, WOMEN ARE COMING TO ME. And my breath STILL reeks, I have no money, I'm missing teeth. But, women seem not to care. This is because I focussed on developing myself. Become more confident, focus on achieving goals, not being needy, improving body language. And generally not caring about having a relationship with a women. THIS seem to be ATTRACTIVE to women...BB and all. It is strange to me. Women BEG for me to go out with them, knowing that my breath smells like crap. The girl who told me my breath stinks, agreed to a SECOND date, but that did not work out, not because of my bb, but we were incompatible. The reason why I'm single right now, is because I choose to be. Does my breath still stinks? lol YES, am I still poor? YES, do women care? It seems not.

The counter productiveness of covering BB

The moment you talk to someone, they ALREADY smelled your breath. You can't hide it, you just can't. You can TRY, by not talking directly to her, or taking under your breath (pun intended) But SHE already knows. And, here's the thing. Trying to HIDE it TURNS HER OFF. She will be come away thinking your breath smells and he's also insecure. HOWEVER, if your convo went good with her and you portray all the right qualities, she WILL find you interesting. And her thought will be "yes his breath stinks BUT BUT BUT, he's confident, he makes me feel a certain way, he's funny etc. And THAT will be more powerful than poo breath. So it becomes counterproductive to "hide" your BB. Hard but true. Now, EVEN people with spring breath are rejected by women, so rejection should not be taken personally. You WILL be rejected in life, learn to live with it. That's part of life....

So men, FOCUS on yourself, develop these traits and learn what really turns on women. And your life will be 100% better....

THERE IS HOPE

Abundantlife,
There is a lot of truth in what you say, but I still say that bad breath is a big turnoff.
As far as your cavities are concerned, you really should have them filled. Cavities do not get better by themselves, they will get worse and cost you more eventually.
Also, the cause of your bad breath could be something other than just cavities. You won't know until you get the cavities taken care of.

No matter what sex someone is, BB is the biggest turn-off, as it not only speaks about health issues but is a no no for kissing. A woman might not want to offend her man, and if she loves him she will stick with him (motherly instinct) waiting and doing anything she can to help, but if the problem does not go away for months and years, it will make her just as unhappy, and she will bring it to talk elsewhere (maybe another relative or a close friend).

I would sell everything i have to get the money to fix the cavities, or go in debt (lucky one is with that issue as it is fixable).

What you're saying makes sense, but I think that your breath can't be all that bad.

No matter how confident you are and how much character you can show, if your breath smells like someone just took a giant shit down your throat, there is no way she can be turned on.

You're forgetting one thing, women are more concerned about hygiene than men. Most of the time, bb is considered a serious lack of personal hygiene.

Good evening.

Yes, I shall get money, soon, my fledging business is picking up. All your points are considered. Of course BB is a condition that is not ideal, denying this fact, was not what I intended to do. The gist is that, to me, it may NOT the issue of BB per se that turns some women off (of course some women will be turned off by it) but, what turns off women more, in my estimate, is what our BB problem made us into. Insecure, low self esteem, anti social etc.

Now, why I'm saying this also, is because I know someone, who had a bad case of BB (that even he admitted, and everyone knew it) But, for some odd reason, he never let is hold him back (he never denied it though) He is a man, confident, good job, car, friendly, helpful, good sense of humor, good body language etc. YET he landed a girl, who has the most perfect teeth and NO BB problems. She is one that is not desperate etc, she is good looking, so she can land any man she wants. And...she said, it is simply because the guy is such a good person, that is strong, emotionally, stands up for what is right, just, prudent and most importantly, does not allow her to walk over him, funny caring, charming etc, and he like me, very average looking (traits that I described above)...They, most likely will get married. With women, it's all about how you make them FEEL. And that feeling, more often than not, trumps BB.

Now, this is not to say, that BB problem should be ignored, or that, everyone will be receptive of it and that even girls that seem not to "care" will or should accept BB all the time, or that they won't be turned off at first etc. Nope, the point is that, BB alone may not be the issue here that keeps us from women. And, in some cases, it is not even the issue.

In conclusion, i'm not saying that it is not an issue to be sorted out, but, when it comes to women, it may not be THE BIG issue that may be keeping back some men...Food (non dairy) for thought


Women are strange, women are indeed very very strange. And yes, it is bad, I have BB, it stinks.

Keep on rocking stud!

Abundantlife, I agree with a lot of what you say - the fact we're more than just a bad smell, but we dont see it because while we have BB, all we see of ourselves IS a bad smell.

That's why people who've never been through this torture cant understand or empaphise with what we go through.

Anyway, have you ever considered using a DIY temporary tooth filling/repair kit sold in most supermarkets?

At least you might be able to seal off some of your cavities and find out whether or not they truly are the cause of your BB - if only temporarily.

Hello halitosisux, you're correct.

I had no idea, it had DIY tooth filling. I come from the Caribbean, so i'll have to look into it as a temporary fix. Yes, BB can ruin self esteem, however, we need to give people more credit, in that people actually LOOK over BB and look at the person behind the BB (that is, if we get over the problem and project someone who is enjoyable, loving, funny cool etc) We should, at least, let people make the decision of how much of an issue our bb problem is to them. Rather than making assumptions on their level of tolerance let them, by their actions and interest in you, decide their own level of tolerance. And, believe me, you can hide, close your mouth, talk under your breath, talk in the opposite direction, once you talk to someone, any where, any time, they ALREADY got a whiff your cover is already broken.

So, if a someone decides to go out with you THEY already took that into consideration...And, if you make it to the 2nd and 3rd date, that's that, its sealed, she likes you DESPITE your BB, this feeling is pretty amazing and very very strange, at the same time.

Keep rocking!

What you say is absolutely true.
I used to have an uncle who took so much care of his appearance. He was was such an amazing person, always funny and charming and had so much charisma. He used to always dress impeccably and always gave a decent impression in every sense - except his breath used to frequently smell awful, a real toothy smell of rot. But he used to wear very strong aftershave and you had to get quite close to him to be subjected to his bad breath.

Its really quite hard to describe. Sitting here thinking about different people I know with BB - how some manage to make it seem so utterly insignificant though positive outward signs of confidence and capability etc.

It was as if the bad smell was neutralized by these outward signs, as if the perception of his bad smell was altered in the mind to one which wasnt as bad.

Same here halitosis. I met a woman, with a bad case of BB, she KNOWS she has it, as well as everyone else. The funny thing is, I have bb, and I'm saying to myself, this woman's breath stinks, and she talking to me, in my face, and she seems like if she doesn't care! HOWEVER on evening we were waiting together for a car, to go home and we had just a wonderful time talking, laughing, and she displayed traits that I like in a woman, strong, bright etc, and I FELT ATTRACTED TO HER, BB or not, just because she portrayed those certain traits. Her breath still stank, but, it seem like it didn't matter...it just didn't matter, at that point in time at least. Humans are strange, very very strange.

Then, there is this girl, that literally begs me to go out, she has no bb problem, healthy teeth, but because I display some of the traits mentioned above, she seems to be interested in ME, sure she knows I have bb, but again she seem not to care.

Then, friends keep inviting me to go out, asking me to go places with them, coming to visit me and I'm like, don't you all have a nose? lol

But then it dawned on me, I'm willing to put up with people's BB when they display confidence, kindness, charm etc, then WHY NOT believe that other people have the ability to do that?

Keeping rocking!

your post is great, i felt good reading it, thx. i would agree with you on most things, its a great guide to get over a halitophobia, too.

i just logged in to tell you that for the cavities you may try xylit also known as xylitol. i heard it can indeed help with cavities, its cheap, easy to use, easy to get, i dont know any mentionable downside.

keep up the good vibes and get your cavities fixed asap.

I definitely agree with you man... BB doesnt mean no girl will want you. I have had plenty of girls interested in me because i am a very friendly guy and i am not shy to start talking to any girl. I have a girl now that is really really interested in me , she always wants to hangout with me study with me texts me etc etc and i keep pushing her away by making up excuses.

The truth is ... you will not be able to have ANY girl w BB.. for some girls it will be a deal breaker but there are many girls out there that will look past your bb if you have confidence, descant looking, bright future etc (most of those you mentioned).

The problem is that it is hard to have confidence in yourself without bb and dont even get me started on how hard it is when you do have bb. There are plenty of good looking non smelling perfectly healty people that have low confidence. Most of the hottest girls out there have low self confidence and always wonder if they look good

Knowing that i have bb and seeing peoples reactions every single day literally kills my confidence. I am a very confident guy until i see the reactions.. i have many friends that invite me everywhere and many times i force my self to go out but there are plenty of times where i also make up an excuse not to go out.

As far as girls, i am sure i could get a date and gf but just the thought of going in for a kiss with bb sends shivers through my spine. Many guys are worried about the kiss when they look good and have perfectly smelling breath... how do we go in for a kiss? If you know anything about dating you will know that if you dont kiss the girl or try to escelate you will be put in friendzone so i almost see no point in going out on dates.

Good afternoon.

Bbsux, I can relate with everything you said especially when you said, you are confident until you see people's reaction, this can be a real confidence breaker. It not only breaks your confidence, it can make you feels anger towards the person that reacts.

I deal with it in a very peculiar way. When interacting with someone think about the WORST thing they can say to you. "your breath stinks" "it smells like crap" "do you have a garbage truck inside there" etc. Think about the worst thing they can say...and just LAUGH! Trust me, it works.

Unless they are nose-less you WILL get a reaction, it is human nature. It all boils down to how much what they say affects us (cliche I know, but it the only way, short of solving the problem)

As for the confidence thing, you're right I see people with PERFECT breath, have low confidence, haunched back can't maintain eye contact, the whole 9 yards. So, it will be harder with BB. However, bb is just another obstacle to overcome and those who have perfect breath, HAVE obstacles that they overcome also. Google "Sean Stephensen" In his case, its not the same, I know, he was born that way etc, to people BB can be controlled and should not be excused as much as say, a disability should be excused. BUT, you can learn something about overcoming difficulties from him, check it out.

Even if you had fresh breath you still will not be able to have ANY girl, and you're right to some women it IS a deal breaker, I'll admit that.

As for the dating thing, my solution, don't worry about the OUTCOME of the date. Don't worry if she will run, don't worry if she thinks you'r the worst person, don't worry if she will call you or see you again. She went out with you, which means she smelt you stank and still agreed. Don't worry about the outcome, JUST HAVE FUN.

The key to women is NOT BEING NEEDY and for us it means just not worrying about the outcome, just go, laugh, enjoy yourself, show her you're a confident guy, show her you're funny, show her you're charming, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY show her alpha male qualities, like making fun of her (in a fun way) maintaining eye contact, good body language, and not taking any bad behavior from her.

Don't focus on a relationship with her, neither focus on ensuring that the "date" goes well etc. Remember, you have goals, dreams to pursue (I hope you do) So SHE IS THE LUCKY one to be a part of your exciting, goal oriented life. Anytime you act like YOU"RE the lucky one or that SHE is the only one for you, that's it, you're done.

So in short, its not about women and relationships, that's NOT the main issue, it is about US. Once our lives are goal oriented, busy, fun filled, exciting, relationships will take of itself, BB or not. This is PROVEN and TESTED.

I once heard someone say. "Figure out where you want to go in life THEN find people who wants to go with you"

Keep rocking!

I actually have a bugaboo, meaning a guy that constantly cals to see me. My son is 3 and his dad and i met when it first started. I always wondered why the hell is he still calling me. I guess if your great you can still be around people. It could be more uncomfortable fo rus than them
My sons ftaher and i ultimately broke up mainly because I let my bretah pull us apart. Hell, he ven asked me to marry him even though he was cheating on me lol
Ithink some cant handle it and some can. People are all diferent. Many peole react to me immediately. have two neghbors one on my left one on my rght. The one on my left nver reacts and talks to me face to face all the time we're friends but she did deny she can smell anything but her kds constantly rub and sneeze then theres my other neghbor whom reacts all the time.
It could be completely quiet on her side and if I open wide to yell to my kids or something she strts to cough.

This reminds me of my best friend. He doesn’t have BB but he does have body odour. His smell varies from noticeable only up close to room filling. The smell is like regular BO but more pungent with a hint of axle grease. Anyway, despite this he is a TOTAL CHICK MAGNET. I swear he could have a hundred girlfriends if he wanted to. He has lots of friends of both genders and no one seems bothered by the smell. He can smell himself and complains about it all the time but he is the only one. In case anyone is wondering no he’s not gorgeous or nor is he rich. In fact he’s pretty much the opposite. The reason people like him so much is because he’s very friendly, sweet and funny. When he talks to people he makes them feel like they are the only one in the room. So despite his odour he has managed to have a pretty enviable life.

Abundant, maybe the reason why you are not concerned about the effect of your BB on relationships with men is because (i hope I read this correctly from your other posts) you have your own business.
I am male, and at work I do not have one boss, I have several who I work with at various times. I also have to meet clients etc, AND I am not the only person in my role.
There are about 30 of us doing my job each trying to outperform the other so that we can be promoted to the next level.
Now all these people I started with get consistently better work ratings than me because they think outside the box, and challenge the current approach etc............ whereas I mostly wait to be told what to do and then do it with as little debate as I can get away with, because..........my mouth smells.
So yeah, I worry about the reaction from men as much as women, cos I have both men and women as my bosses. And my colleagues are all moving ahead of me because they appear better than me.