Bad Breath Halitosis Forum

Some of you may remember my prev post talking about my ex boyfriend but I'm going to fill in the newbies anyways and update you all....

I have a current ex boyfriend that I have been on and off with since I was 15 years old, I'm now 26. He's been with me before I ever started having this damn bb. He has never said anything to me about it or has never tried to make me feel less than a beautiful woman (aside from cheating but I'll get into that). Every time we argue or fight I call him every hurtful name in the book and believe me I hit below the belt but then I start feeling so bad afterwards because he has never said anything about me or called me names in return. He tells me I'm fine (which he's referring to my looks) and everything he wants in a woman but my attitude is just messed up. He says that if I changed my attitude then our relationship would be perfect and he would marry me.When I first met him at 15 i was the sweetest person in the world to him which is why he fell in love with me. He was 19 at the time and would always take me around he's friends bragging about me. But now after finding him cheating so many times and developing bad breath I have become bitter. Everything he does gets on my nerves. I honestly think he stays with me only because of our good sex. He always says sex is the only thing holding our relationship togather because their is no affection. I always throw up the fact that he cheated as an excuse for my behaviour, even though I know that he has changed. He says that I'm still holding things against him from when he was 19 years old and now he's 30. He has made alot of changes through the years. He went from smoking weed and drinking beer all day to quitting everything cold turkey for over 5 years now. I don't want him to know the real reason for me not showing affection or love which is my bb. That old saying "how can you love someone else, when you don't love yourself" is sooo true. I wanted nothing more than to wrap my arms around him and kiss him passionately. I wanted for us to cuddle after sex or even while watching a movie. I wanted to whisper sweet nothings in his ear. I'm a taurus woman so I love being touchy and feely which is the way I was when we first met. I showed him so much attention and affection. I believe he's sticking around wanting the old me he feel inlove with to return. We are currently not togather and he is seeing someone else now, and I'm talking to someone else as well. But last night we stayed on the phone talking until 4am. From our convo I know he still loves me and I could get him back if I really tried. He always talks about me to every girlfriend that has had on our 'off' times to the point they feel like he's still inlove with me. He told me one of the girls actually said she didn't want to her my name any more. He showed the new girl he is talking to my picture (for what I have no idea) but he told me she said I was pretty. I don't know what to do about this situation but talking to him is as comfortable as an old pair of socks, I think thats why I stayed so long afraid of someone new having to deal with my sh*t, literally.......

Anyways, enough about the ex. I actually met another guy after me and my ex broke up. Even though I love my ex deeply and have been with him forever, I really feel like this new guy is everything I want in a man as far as stability, security, and solidness. He is an amatuer boxer and a correctional officer of 10 years. He owns his own home which he's since paid off and has no children at the age of 31. He says now he's ready to settle down and start a family. I've actually been friends with him for 2 years but he had a girlfriend at the time and I had my ex so we remained friends. Now we are both single and he wants to hook up. We have only hung out a few times so he knows my bb problem but yet he still wants to always see or be around me. Before I used my ex boyfriend as an excuse now that we are not togather any longer he feels as if I'm just playing with him because their is always an excuse why I don't want to see him. He may think that I'm seeing someone else but I'm just not comfortable being intimate or in relationships especially with someone new. I believe that he would take me for who I am because during the times we had chilled he always wanted me near him. He's a taurus too so he is also touchy feely like I used to be. When he was on my computer desktop in my apartment he wanted me to pull up a chair and sit by him. Another time we hung out he wanted to watch sports and I wanted to watch something else so I was going to go into my bedroom to watch tv in there but he asked me to stay in the living room on the couch with him. This man must have a high tolerance for bullshit, literally, lol! Because he never flinches or anything when we talk, I think he tries to make me comfortable. Anyways, to make a long story short he is stable, secure, and loyal everything I want in a husband but I am petridfied to start a new relationship with someone right now. I honestly prefer to be left alone in my stench but I really don't want to let this good guy go who obviously doesn't seem to mind my bb. I'm ashamed and scared and just don't know what to do.... Please God

Love & BB: Water & Fire

wow HG, I totally understand your situation. I hope that I'm wrong in your case but sometimes people pursues us despite our bb because they think that it's something that will pass. They don't know that it's something we have all the time and that we can't do anything about it, and when they realize it's permanent that's when they back off. Hopefully that will not happen with you and this new guy, but usually that's what happen from my experience

Thanks Jess, I think that is why I stayed with my ex for all these years because he loved me no matter what. I'm scared of venturing into something new because of that fear. From past experiences with other men on my off time with my ex I've was always been the one to leave or call it off. One guy I sent a text to stating that I didn't want to see him anymore, he got so angry and upset at me and called me a 'stank bitch'. This same guy had brought me breakfast, took me out to eat (when I was still brave enough to go), brought me gifts, and showed me his rental properties, I guess he was trying to show off. Funny after all that I became a 'stank bitch' because i no longer wanted to see him. Another guy tried to make me feel like I needed him, once when we argued and I said I didn't need him, he said that no one else will deal with my smell but him. My ex never made me feel that way. Everyone from my mother, sister, brothers, friends, etc has mentioned my bb to my face except for my ex. He always tries to make me feel comfortable. During our talk last night he stated that I always tried to make him be someone he was not instead of accepting him the way he is. He said that he loved me and accepted me for the way I am and know he was referring to my bb. I love him deeply for always trying to protect my feelings regardless of how much I disregard his. I think he knows I'm unhappy because he always says it. He sees how I don't spend any time with my family and stay couped up in my apartment. It's crazy that my family has to call him just to see how I'm doing because I don't pick up the phone or answer there calls anymore. I've ran out of excuses on why I can't attend birthdays, graduations, and funerals...

Yea I understand it is hard facing new people with this problem. Seems like you still have plenty of guys interested in you and willing to ignore your problem. I would say just go for it. I know its scary, but this guy has been hanging with you even though he knows about your problem. I think it's worth a shot.

It's tough with this problem. I've always had social anxiety before my bb, but now this problem makes it way worse. I get such a bad feeling inside me every time I have to go to public places or be around people. I try my best to avoid going out now. My friends keep asking to hang out, but I always tell them I can't.

It's also harder since I am a guy I have to approach girls if I want to go out on dates. Now I feel way to anxious to talk to any girls and I'm sure no one will want to go out once they get close enough to smell me.