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Surrender to the will of God
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Surrender to the will of God
Steroids and antibiotics didn't do anything for me.
Yesterday I saw an ENT doctor, my sinuses look very healthy, no infection, no polyps. The only thing is that my inferior turbinate is enlarged. A turbinate-reduction might or might not reduce the post nasal drip as it seems that the membranes of my sinuses just react overactive in general on heat/cold etc(I'm not allergic).
In the past year I've emotionally suffered a lot. Things like talking to people became a sacrifice. In this period I started a new job and it affected my work as it was hard for me to consult colleagues for advice, I was locked up in my body, couldn't express myself.
I became isolated. I have very nice friends who accepts me the way I am but emotionally it was to exhausting to meet with them.
When I reflect on this episode of my life, it should have been the worse I ever had to go through. When I look at it from the outside it was. Maybe it was in some way but there was also a peace I can't describe. The time I spent alone I read religious books, I visited mass, I cooked healthy meals. I knew, God was there. He heard my desire to "heal" from this, but God permits it in my life (at this moment). Nothing that happens in our Life, happens outside the will of God. The only reason why He permits things in our life, is because in a mystical way He can turn it into something positive. Everything He permits is for our own good.
I do not understand why, I am sometimes crying so sad am I, but I know in his infinite wisdom, He decided that it is good this way.
For the ones who are religious, there is many books written about "complete surrender to the will of God".
I have countless moments of tears and sadness wondering when and if God will heal me, but theres just something in my spirit that just knows ONE day ..perhaps when i meet Him face to face I will understand why I had to deal which such a horrible, embarrassing "sickness". Perhaps, if I didnt have this I wouldnt be so sensitive to others and their feelings, perhaps Id be arrogant and over look other people, maybe I would make fun of people and talk behind their backs if they had bad breath. Because I have this I am very caring & sensitive towards others, I notice things other people dont.
Maybe ..for sure I wouldnt have the relationship I have with Him now. If I didnt have bad breath I dont think Id look for God as much as I do. Maybe Id feel Im OK without Him. But i recognize how much i NEED Him! And When I pray and spend time worshiping God I feel His beautiful presence and love! I know He cares! Just have to hang in there. He will heal me ..one day I know it!
Sorry for such a long post, but you saying what you did reinforces my belief
Whenever I read someones story it always touches my heart so much..I pray for healing for all of us.!
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Remember that the restlessness and despair always come from the devil.
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." [Jn 14:27].
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This gave me a lot of relief.believe wrote:
..perhaps when i meet Him face to face I will understand why I had to deal which such a horrible, embarrassing "sickness". Perhaps, if I didnt have this I wouldnt be so sensitive to others and their feelings, perhaps Id be arrogant and over look other people, maybe I would make fun of people and talk behind their backs if they had bad breath. Because I have this I am very caring & sensitive towards others, I notice things other people dont.
Thanks
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