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having bad breath and being in an "intimate" relat

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cat
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having bad breath and being in an "intimate" relat

Post by cat »

there is this guy that is really interested in me. we hung out for 3 days straight one weekend (and sure enough i was offered gum 3 or 4 times...), and he has since um, made moves, so to speak. but he lives at the other end of the country, so nothing intimate has actually happened. but christ, he wants us to be a "couple", and he's coming up to see me again in the not too distant future.

i cannot comprehend this. if my breath stinks, how can anyone even THINK about being intimate with me? eugh, i would never kiss someone with bad breath, it would be a horrific experience. i dont know how he's going to get past this. i mean, he must have noticed i have bad breath - we were together day and night 3 days straight. so. how in the hell did you guys who have been in relationships get past this barrier?

help is needed, because if he makes a move, i think i'd be too self conscious to respond in kind... and i'll probably pull away. and. well. HELP!!

thanks in advance :shock:


emotional rescue
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Post by emotional rescue »

Hi!!

For sure the worst part of having bb....intimate relationships....

So, to have more information:

-How do you feel dating with him three dasy in a row? Do you felt confortable? was you nervous about your breath?

-He offered gums 3 or 4 times? Did you accept? Did he use gum too when he offers you?

-How do you manage to hide your bb, how is your general higiene routine??


But in advance.....if he´s making moves about you and come to see you three times and wants to come back is because he likes you. BB or not he likes you. So feel happy about it and enjoy it! Be yourself and relax...... Get intimate, this is your life, enjoy. You don´t need to know if he thinks you have bb or not. Maybe you breath is not that bad as you think, or maybe he just don´t care, there´s a lot of people for what the bb is not so big deal........soooo..... maybe you found the right guy!!

good luck!
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Ice
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Post by Ice »

Cat,
a free piece of advice,
go for it, If the dude was bothered by bb, he would have said so something, and would make sure u know what was his opinion on the subject, u are worriing to much! I'll tel u how guys think, and we put up with alot more than just bb. Obviouslly it does not bother him that much. Trust me, don't even think about it....;)
good luck
elliott
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Post by elliott »

Well just don't read too much into things. Guys can be... weird sometimes, when they want what they want. 3 days isn't enough time to know how serious it is.

Best thing to do is to be open about it... if you can't talk about it, then what kind of relationship will it be?
sweets07
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Post by sweets07 »

you probably don't have bb all the time. i have friends who have fecal smelling breath sometimes and when they chew gum it goes away. for example, i went out with my friend once and her breath was kickin (fecal) but i didn't say anything because i was probably in bad shape too. a guy we came with that likes her kept talking to her and was all up on her. my assumption was that he didn't care because when she started to chew gum it went away. i'd say her bb came back about twice that night, then it just never came back... weird.

anyway if i were u i would go ahead and be intimate -if u feel he's worth it. then afterwards ask about your breath- what it smells like and how often it's bad. it's a perfect opportunity to know the extent of your situation.
thanatos
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Post by thanatos »

:-k
Last edited by thanatos on Fri Jan 17, 2014 4:49 am, edited 1 time in total.
destined
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Post by destined »

I agree, you should go for it. Enjoy the company and if it doesn't work out at least you tried. Having BB complicates my ability to feel comfortable around others especially in an intimate setting, however I know I can't shy away from the entire world. I am very selective with the people I consider to be my friends. If a person doesn't want to be around you they will leave and vice versa.

See what happens. Life is too short.
spygirl
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Post by spygirl »

Cat, if you like this guy, hold on to him with your dear life. Chances like this may not come again. It's normal to be really conscious and paranoid about your bb, but don't let it get in the way of intimacy. I believe that humans become very intuitive when it comes to it, so if you hold back due to bb his senses will most likely pick it up. So enjoy yourself. Would you rather let this chance pass and be hooked on what-could-have-been's?
cat
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Post by cat »

thanks for your responses everyone.

i'm thinking if he tries anything, i might just broach the subject with him... as in, say "you do realise i have bad breath, right?" or something like that.

do you think this is a good or a bad idea?

i don't know if i can just "go for it"... because he might think i'm unaware of the problem, and just fail to brush my teeth! which is pretty disgusting really.
brokenbuthopeful
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Post by brokenbuthopeful »

why dont u look 4 some one who is suffering from the same problem. i.e. BB. it would make ur life much easier. instead of taking risks and being left alone in a closed street in the middle of the night; u should better find some one who accepts u with all ur qualities and disqualities.
Leena
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Post by Leena »

cat wrote: i'm thinking if he tries anything, i might just broach the subject with him... as in, say "you do realise i have bad breath, right?" or something like that.

do you think this is a good or a bad idea?
Oh my God! No! This is absolutely bad idea.
Just imagine the romance in a date where you just say something about having a bad breath!
Instead you should try to be as interesting and tempting as possible. Smile. Be funny. Play with him. Be close, be distant, be elusive. But do not bring up the subject in any way!
If it`s that bad he`ll say something and you`ll be able to explain the BB situation. However, I`m sure it`s not so bad because he wants to see you again and again.
sadgirlbb
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Post by sadgirlbb »

I have a new boyfriend.... I NEVER would bring up BB unless he did. I'm just so embarrassed about it! But at the same time I wish I knew how he felt about it....I chew gum constantly when I'm around him. I can't chew the minty type gums... they make my breath really BAD. The bubble gum varieties work the best for me. How terrible we even have to deal with this!

I think you just need to go for it. You won't know unless you try!!
thanatos
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Post by thanatos »

sadgirlbb wrote:I have a new boyfriend.... I NEVER would bring up BB unless he did. I'm just so embarrassed about it! But at the same time I wish I knew how he felt about it....I chew gum constantly when I'm around him. I can't chew the minty type gums... they make my breath really BAD. The bubble gum varieties work the best for me. How terrible we even have to deal with this!

I think you just need to go for it. You won't know unless you try!!
He never comments or reacts?
sadgirlbb
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Post by sadgirlbb »

Not so far. I'm always chewing gum, escaping to the bathroom to swallow Therabreath.... etc. I would be horrified. He works 70 hours a week, so it cuts down the time I really see him. Sometimes I don't mind, because of the bb. We talk on the phone a LOT because of his hours.
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Ice
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Post by Ice »

he's probably married and needs an extra "girl", if he's aallways so bussy ;)
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