forewarning

[fess]

hi, i recently stumbled on this forum which i really wasn't
looking for. i wanted to share my thoughts to you guys which probably be longer then i want and may seem more like the chronicles of fess then just a short message. brief description of myself. 36 yr old male latino living in north jersey formally worked in nyc as a ct/x-ray tech for a prominent hospital. i say formal because i abruptly resigned over a year ago because of my little friend hali. i decided it was enough on living with this condition and made an ultimatum with myself, either i beat this thing or it beats me. I really don't want to go any further on that. but i just want to warn all the young people that been writing on believing the cure is right around the corner. i would say i'm definitely more of a realist than a pessimist anyday, and sad to say lost my spirit and fortitude of optimism.
you guys put up all these ads from comm. brands of topical rinses. i
hate to be the bearer of bad news it just won't work. you have to understand your ailment more and how it works. the bad bacteria
in your mouth where 90% of it comes if not systemic is deep rooted in the
gums essentially in your bloodstream. the best these topical rinses do is mask it for just a short period of time where the bacteria eventually overcomes and adapts, bacteria is some pretty powerful shit as we all know. without going scientific it's one of the building blocks of life going back 4.2 bill yrs ago. what i'm saying is the ancient egyptians and greeks were trying to figure this out over 5thousand years ago. the only thing that killed off thier extreme advance civilizations was greed and wars. if those great minds were alive today with our technology and resources they wrap up cancer and bb in about a week and have us living in space colonies by now.
of course i'm exaggerating but what i'm saying is you just might have to come to the ugly truth is accepting to live with this for life if your strong enough. i'm afraid i gave up that fight and just gased out. i can't live muttering my way when i talk, scraping my tongue with a spoon every hour to smell how awful it is, talking 90 degrees of someone because anything closer than 10 feet face to face is too close, or putting my ear to my apt door to make sure nobody is in the hallway. or watching dvd's alone resorting to drinking and smoking weed every night. smoking weed is not due to bb, i really do enjoy smoking cheeba but not alone anymore. i have to admit i lost the good fight. i've lost count on the number of dentists and specialist out there gone out to three states out of new jersey from where i live, enough is enough. if your strong and willful which i was long ago try not to fold. but i do believe in the quality of life and i know it just won't be there in which i defined for myself. be brave but don't fool yourself. have optimism but be realistic. for all you middle age people out there, big props or do you have jobs where communication is not needed or just suffer through your virtual prison. i'm beyond depression and pissed mad, i'm just a man who refuses to be something i'm not. you ever see a person male or female in thier 50's waiting for the end having misery ooze in thier body language, that just won't be me. i give you guys credit though you have camaraderie, live by the phrase from the marvel movie "hellboy" all us freaks have is each other. no we're not freaks but who else can share our particular pain. i do want to recognise the older gentleman who is 63 and wrote, get creative with your mind and do something with your life that will fulfill u with happiness and not look outward for people's approval.

[thanatos]

[Jimi Stein]

I believe we wil be able to remove bb by doing daily routine, I somehow believe that. I am tired also, some people want me dead already because of bb, so I will probably just give up too.

I mean giving up is when you get sick you dont go to the doc, you just let the nature do what it has to do.

Like if I would get pneumonia I would just let it be.

Till my bb exists I will not be able to get a partner, or have kids. The only thing that is is to be alone and just linger from day to day.

[Eric]

To the topic creator, I do believe there is a possibility there is no real cure and that this is rooted in our metabolic processes, lurking in our bloodstream and gums. I hold out hope, but maybe only because I'm young.

What do you guys think I should do? I'm already looking into getting a career where I can work in a solitary fashion or from home, but what about love and sex? I want so bad to meet a girl that has this same condition it hurts...

[emotional rescue]

we cannot know, we cannot know,

There´s no prove of anything about this condition cause it isn´t seriuos research at all, so we cannot know....

But now there´s people and companies that allready Know that halithosis is a very good business, and the news runs fast today,

I would say our chances are 50% - 50%, and we have to stick to that 50%

For me, once that you have this disorder, the rest is allllllllllll mental,
I´ve been suffering from this shit for 12 years know, and i have periods of feeling like shit were i don´t want to do anything, and there´s periods were i´m quite ok and i feel good.....and i think that in my case it´s all very related to hope, i always need to see some light, to believe there is a chance, otherwise i start to slowly dying inside, and is one of the worsts feelings that a guy can have...


This last month, i was feeling like shit, worst than ever, no hope, no strenght,
I didn´t knew what to do, so i started to see a therapist, and started to talk about all this nightmare, i told him even about the site, everything,
I thought that if i couldn´t stop to have bb right know, maybe i could try to change the way i took it.

Anyway, this month i felt like i was escaping from everything, from work, from my friends, i was escaping from go out....

I got to say that i allways was a guy very succesfull with girls at least for being with ths disorder.....
But i´m allways so afraid that a girl discovers my bb!! it´s my worst nightmare for me, it´s the way all started for me....

So, i got all this possibilities to date a lot of beautifull girls, but i was hidding and hidding and making excuses...
But i was feeling sooo bad this month that i thought that i have to put balls on this and do something...

So this night i go out for a drink with a beautifull girl, we went to a bar, i was nervous, but i did the best i could, by the end of the bar i was kissing her, (she, those persons with best breath ever) i was afraid bus with with the night running i was earning confidence....

we ended in my house and we made love all night, and it was great, and not one reaction, some miracle came from the sky and my breath was ok...


Sorry for the bad english, I just arrived from there and i´m a little drunk yet and tired,

I forgot what was my point, but i guess that what i was trying to say is that sometimes we got to take risks and overcome the fear....

and sometimes you get rewarded....


peace,

[jc]

I`ve always believed that there is a cure for every disease(yeah even for ch) & I`ve always reminded myself that every time I get really depressed. I`ve always considered my bb as one of the worst there is, judging from distance & the reactions I get. For the past 6 months I`ve taken supplements that I think can work well against my bb. The past couple of months I`ve been having slow but sure improvements so don`t give up guys.
Remember "patience" is key.

[sharmayne]

I believe that there will be a cure, maybe not in our life time. Oh well at least we did something, we tried to help our future sufferers, we were'nt selfish. We all wish it helped us but maybe help comes to late, We can still say that we tried thanks to people like Jimi who has pioneered for this site. Thank you Jimi I mean it. You really understand and are one of us. Other than him who else is really on our side and fighting for us. We need help and demand to be heard, smell our breath and understand where we are coming from. This is not a lack of f----- hygiene


Sharmayne

[spygirl]

ER is right. We are making small companies big and news travels fast. So I think sooner or later big guys will be spending big bucks on their R&D to manufacture better products for bb.

The day my ENT told me that there is a chance that I will smell like this all my life was one of the worst days of my life. I guess at least once in a lifetime, everyone has the right to get depressed and I grab mine together with paranoia and social black out right after that. It is fortunate that I have my faith in God and that I have people who truly love me. So with or withour foreseen cure, I will never dream of an exit that is hurtful to God and to my loved ones. I have to fight this war no matter how long it takes and there is no chance in this world that I will let it defeat me. I am in the middle of waking up from that ugly depression and I am positive I will, very very soon.

It is good that I talked to my pastor about my problems and he advised me to just continue with a regular normal hygiene and live my life. I threw out all those halitomafia products three months ago and the only toothpaste I use is Dentiste. I also try to raise my alkaline level by taking baking soda on empty stomach and increase my intake of raw veggies and fruits to 50%. I also omit sugar and dairy products from my diet and as per today, I can honestly say that I am 70% better on average. I have gladness in my heart everytime I pray because I feel better each day and I have that feeling that soon I will be able to live a normal life.

I am raising my alkalinity level