How did you tell your family/friends etc. about your BB?

BBsucks · Post by **BBsucks** » Sat Oct 16, 2010 11:03 pm

I would LOVE to hear stories on how you brought up the topic of your BB to loved ones. I have been with my husband a total of 10 years (married 4 years) and I have NEVER said a word about how this affects me. I literally cannot bring myself to say ANYTHING.

Also I'd like to say something to good friends but don't want to sound like an ass. I mean who is going to believe that I'm trying EVERYTHING but really it is not curable at this moment? To them they probably just think I should brush more.

I know that if I can bring myself to tell loved ones, I will feel so much better.

dark · Post by **dark** » Sun Oct 17, 2010 1:51 am

It is better to live with this sadness alone. If you tell those you love how this affect you every day, you will make them suffer too.
You can tell them that you have a problem with bb, but don´t mention the pain that you suffer day by day.

thomasthomas · Post by **thomasthomas** » Sun Oct 17, 2010 12:11 pm

dark: I wonder something; with that sort of logic, would you tell your family you have a cancer if you had one?

BBsucks · Post by **BBsucks** » Sun Oct 17, 2010 1:40 pm

Dark-I'm sorry you feel that way. Me personally I cannot handle holding this in any longer. I have been suffering for about 15 years and have NEVER told a single person. I'm going to bust if I don't. I just can't seem to let it out.....

hopelessone · Post by **hopelessone** » Sun Oct 17, 2010 2:38 pm

no one should suffer in silence. It's deadly.

TIRED · Post by **TIRED** » Sun Oct 17, 2010 8:27 pm

I have lived with bb on and off (mostly on) for 20 years now. My husband still doesn't believe I have bb - luckily he doesn't smell it. I told my friends separately at different times. The easiest way is to just say that you have a nasal problem or digestive problem that is giving you horrible breath. Just mention that you are going to see a doctor or you have an appt. (even if you don't), and they usually will ask why. Then, go into the explanation. One of my friends once said that her husband says she has bad breath, and then we compared notes. It was great. Some friends say they have smelled nothing, some just stay quite and smile as if they have smelled it. It is so great to have them know that I know, because I feel like they are more sensitive and caring about it and less judgmental. Also, they are less inclined to offer mints and gum to me. I hate that!

BBsucks · Post by **BBsucks** » Sun Oct 17, 2010 8:38 pm

TIRED:

Thanks for your advice. I sooo want to tell people because this is seriously just killing me slowly. I just have to get up the guts to start the conversation. And my husband must know all about my BB but for some reason it just doesn't bother him. He doesn't act embarrassed of me or for me and doesn't usually make comments (although he has made mention that he thinks our son pooped his pants, but it is rare).

Haligone · Post by **Haligone** » Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:20 pm

I also think it is better to tell someone....... you will be lucky if you get someone who actually admits or agrees with you.
I have told my wife, my sister, brother-in -law, and 2 great friends and they all say I do not have BB. Yet when I was at work today, the girl I was working with was pulling her hair round her nose as a shield to use against my BB!!
If you get someone who agrees with you, then you can ask objectively for their help in diagnosing the problem, and letting you know when it gets bad.

stressedout · Post by **stressedout** » Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:53 pm

Haligone

what if the girl you were working with was flirting with you

you know women use their hair that way hehe. Just trying to make you feel better, but seriously her putting the hair up to her nose doesnt mean you had BB!

Haligone · Post by **Haligone** » Fri Oct 22, 2010 7:37 am

Stressedout, that would have been great!!! (although I am married and she knows lol).
Anyway, why would that gesture NOT mean that I have BB. I always think she/other girls are trying to use the scent of their hair or shampoo to mask the BB when they do that.

dark · Post by **dark** » Fri Oct 22, 2010 7:13 pm

About 2 years ago, my mother told me all the time why I don't go to parties, why I spend all day at the computer, if I'm going to stay all day here, then I should clean the house, etc.
Well, one day I couldn't take it any more and I told my mother all the pain that I had to pass every day and that was the reason I didn't go out. Since that day, my mom had a sad face.
I regret having said that.

thomasthomas wrote:dark: I wonder something; with that sort of logic, would you tell your family you have a cancer if you had one?

No, if I had cancer, I wouldn't tell my mother, I would combat that alone.

hopelessone · Post by **hopelessone** » Fri Oct 22, 2010 9:41 pm

my family doesn't care. it seems they have deserted me at my most needful time of support. it boggles my mind.

Haligone · Post by **Haligone** » Fri Oct 22, 2010 11:20 pm

hopelessone, when you say they have deserted you. Is it that they notice it and shun you, or is it that they do not notice it, and therefore pay it no attention?

hopelessone · Post by **hopelessone** » Sat Oct 23, 2010 1:39 am

they KNOW i have it. They have turned their backs on me. I don't understand it.

TIRED · Post by **TIRED** » Sat Oct 23, 2010 5:23 am

Hopeless - how did you tell them? My husband no longer is very sympathetic because he truly cannot smell it. My mom doesn't smell it and is pretty done with me too. But, I know I still have it. Students that I work with constantly say things. I have developed tough skin though over the years. It's a lonely disease. Thank goodness for this forum!

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